The Bard is Back in Town, the Thought of it Doth Make My Faint Heart Bleed…

 

The Bard is back…the Bard is back…at least that’s the latest rumor going around.  A discovery of a hitherto unreleased work by Shakespeare has surfaced; a play some scholars maintain is based on an earlier work of that witty wordsmith William, something called Cardenio.  I am unfamiliar with Cardenio.  It sounds like a drink made with vodka and tinged a pretty shade of blue.  Or an island in the South Pacific.  But a play by Shakespeare?

I’m just tickled pink by this discovery.  Okay maybe not so much.  I have several  large volumes of Shakespeare’s works up in my crap room   craft room  home office  study/library.   I have read many of his plays – I get to a certain point and then blood starts dripping from my eyes and I pass out from either overuse of archaic English or just the fact I want him to speed it up a bit.  He is difficult to read;  although I admit his works are amazing, if a bit time-consuming as I find I must read and re-read many passages to get their full meaning.  There’s an awful lot of doth, thou, and didst going on in those plays. 

Like Emperor Joseph in Amadeus telling Mozart his music is fine; it just has too many notes, I would like to tell Shakespeare his writing is lovely; it just has too many words.  Well, there it is.  And with that I am sure to have all the Shakespeare fans come swooping down on my head.  Having uttered this insult Shakespeare might have replied to me, “What villain was it spake that word?…My foes I do repute you every one: So, trouble me no more, but get you gone.”  (Titus Andronicus).  Ouch – makes my ears bleed. 

I admit I enjoyed Hamlet… oh wait, I might have been thinking about the movie starring a younger and gorgeous Mel Gibson. Oops.  Okay, I read Romeo & Juliet (what high school student didn’t?) and I do love some of Shakespeare’s Sonnets.  But is the world really ready for another work by Shakespeare?  It would be more fun if instead of one of his lost plays they discovered one of his lost video games…Othello for Wii…

Besides — I have enough reading material stacked up on my table already – this work of his has been lost since the 18th century…I think it can wait a little longer to be added to my reading list…  William might sum it up this way: 

When to the sessions of sweet silent thought
I summon up remembrance of things past,
I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought,
And with old woes new wail my dear time’s waste…
  excerpt from Sonnet XXX

As for me dear Bard, I doth desire  a good mystery written in today’s vernacular and shall visit you anon.  sigh…

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