Was it Forest who quoted “mama says: stupid is as stupid does”? Coz that was my day Thursday. Stupid with a capital S. If it wasn’t for the fact I was laughing so hard all day, I’d probably be curled up on the floor in the fetal position sucking my thumb.
I started stupid early; I woke up that way. Then I spilled my coffee. Burned my hand. Stupid. While in work-mode, I noticed I jotted down a meeting on my work calendar; actually, a mini-training. Couldn’t locate back-up information, no email, no other notes or notices. No clue where this originated and a sneaking suspicion it’s incorrect. I had to email my boss to ask her about it. Great impression that made. On-the-job-Stupid.
Fixed Crock Pot chicken soup — felt the need for some soul food. Had to make a Target run to pick up Devoted Spouse’s medicine. When I came home guess what I found? Un-huh…chicken soup alllllll over the counter. Seems I put an abnormally large chicken, assorted veggies and stock into a 6 quart Crock Pot when I should have used a larger Crock Pot. Devoted Spouse stood there in the early a.m. watching me cut up onions and carrots and he heard me griping about the fact that the chicken was gonna be too large for the Crock Pot. He said and I quote: “There’s a huge hole in the inside of the chicken; use that to stuff the vegetables in and you’ll save space.” I listened to him and his bright idea. Top Chef Stupid. Chicken everywhere…
Fixed a quick lunch. I sought solace in frozen pizza. Dropped it on the family room floor coz the plate slipped out of my hand while I was trying to catch something somebody was saying on tv. Not-Paying-Attention Stupid. EmmaLou was in Major Snarf Mode and she got my lunch off that floor so fast I didn’t even need to use the Resolve on the carpet. Unfortunately, about an hour later she yakked up my lunch on the same floor and that time I DID need the Resolve. Dog Stupid.
Went on another errand — had a problem with my Smart Phone. It ate one of my apps and I couldn’t get it back. I walked in the phone store and approached this 20-something young man with arms full of colorful tattoos and a big smile. ( Wait…that didn’t come out right…HE had the arms full of colorful tattoos and a big smile – I had the Smart phone and a puzzled look.) I told him my issue and he calmly re-loaded my app and showed me what to do if that happened again. He spoke v-e-r-y slowly. I wanted to slap the snot outta him for that. Then he showed me another cool feature which I forgot by the time I got to my car and didn’t have the guts to go back inside and ask about. Tech Stupid.
Afternoon meeting scheduled with one of my team members to go over a process I’m working on. Up the stairs I ran to plug in the hot curlers and do something with these out-of-control tresses. Picked up the hot curler container and promptly dropped it on the floor where it turned upside down, spilled out all the curlers and pins plus broke the plastic top. Stupid and Clumsy. Got half way to my meeting and had to call Devoted Spouse because I couldn’t remember if I had unplugged the hot curlers. Runaway Stupid.
I know at one point in history people with leprosy had to announce loudly to the world ahead of, behind, and around their general area: Unclean! Unclean! so people could get out of harm’s way. Perhaps I need to walk around hollering Stupid! Stupid Woman Comin’ Through!” so it doesn’t rub off on anyone else…sigh…