Dear Santa: I Want a Puppy for Christmas! Sincerely, Michael Vick

 

pic courtesy of bittenandbound.com

I read an article recently which stated that Michael Vick (the Philadelphia Eagles quarterback for those of you who don’t follow sports or news of any type)  wants to get a dog. The man who spent 18 months in prison for running a dog-fighting ring wants a pet of his very own now.   He claims it would help him in his rehabilitation process.  That’s like giving an alcoholic a big bottle of Bailey’s Irish Cream to keep him centered on his sobriety.

Michael Vick is a convicted animal abuser.  Even the courts have ruled he is not allowed to own a dog for a set amount of time.  So, being the creative thinker I am, I have a way we can settle this and keep everyone happy this Christmas.

Michael:  Get your butt to Walgreens.  On Aisle 3 you’ll see the following:

Buy ONE.  Take it home.  Open the Box. Read the Instructions.  Take out the Chia Pet.  Soak your new puppy in water.  Spread the Chia seeds on him gently.  Follow ALL the instructions.  I’ll come check on you in about 2 months — if that Chia Pet is bald or has a busted leg, the answer is Definitely NO you cannot have a dog.  And for goodness sake, don’t go buying TWO Chia Pets with the idea of pitting them one against the other.  One final suggestion:  please don’t put your Chia Pet in a cage.    Santa’s watching you.

Take care of your Chia Pet Michael and then we’ll talk fur-ther….  Merry Christmas…sigh…

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8 thoughts on “Dear Santa: I Want a Puppy for Christmas! Sincerely, Michael Vick

  1. Hey Linda!

    LOL! Brilliant idea! I wonder if Michael Vick is now one of your faithful blog readers since you’re now a famous blogger. 😉

    Thanks for the laughs and a Merry Christmas to you too!

    Dr. Rus
    I would seriously doubt it. He’s too busy looking for a puppy to bother with the likes of lil ole me. LOL Merry Christmas!

  2. LOL. I’d throw in the first dog training lesson for FREE:

    1) Sit! Stay!
    u left out…. Attack! snort

  3. Freaking brilliant!
    LOL I just hope he doesn’t show up at my house with a flippin pit bull…. giggles

  4. Probably the most unintelligent blog I’ve seen of all blog attempting to bash Mike Vick. You can’t compare apples to oranges “That’s like giving an alcoholic a big bottle of Bailey’s Irish Cream to keep him centered on his sobriety”

    Dog fighting is not an addiction!

    What some people will say/type to gain attention “look at me I typed something bogus!!!” (This blog)
    I am not bashing Michael Vick. You are dense. Obviously you are the unintelligent one here if you think that Michael Vick can be trusted with an animal again after what he did to those dogs. And for your information, you apparently don’t understand sarcasm, satire or humor. You think cruelty to animals isn’t an addiction? You are wrong. Cruelty to animals is an addiction because it gives Mr. Vick a thrill; one he will return to over and over again. While I am all in favor of you having an opinion here, I believe the majority of people would disagree with you. At least I certainly hope so because you are living in a dream world to even consider letting that man near a dog again. Should you care to visit again and you disagree with me, at least present a cogent (look it up) argument. You call me bogus? What a piece of work you are! Thanks for the laugh.

  5. Love the chia pet idea.

    As for the previous comment from ‘art fields’ – this is weird. I read lots of blog entries, don’t agree with them, and move on. wonder why he/she felt the need to write so many words on your little ‘unintelligent blog’?

    Keep up the sarcasm and humor…we all need more of it!
    Hi honey – I approved it because his/her dumb comment made me laugh and I thought I’d see how many more people chime in on how ‘unintelligent’ my blog is…. ROFLMAO. {{{hugs}}} Merry Christmas!

  6. ooh, some strong opinion coming in on this one! Michael Vick has been playing so well and I so want to see some redemption but hope was a little dashed on the news that he recently splashed a load of money on a new Porsche for his new girlfriend. Still, it only has four wheels, not four legs . . .
    yeah this hits a real sore spot with me – I’m glad the sports world has re-integrated him into their fold and he’s making tons of money again – some of it should go to shelters for homeless animals and not so much to the Porsche but that’s just my humble opinion. I get a lil crazy around greedy people…. thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment! Happy New Year to ya! 😉

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