Are We Having Fun Yet?

image courtesy of puppetgov.com

We’re back to the TSA and that infernal full body scan this morning.  I noticed on one of the morning talk shows even a PILOT refused to go in that blasted machine so Bubba-in-the-back-room could peruse his jewels for hidden treasure..er…I mean weapons.

I’m with that pilot.  We are totally out of control on this security issue.  It will be a cold day in Hades before I let them do an “anonymous” full body scan on me.  Do we actually know the long term effects of this backscatter ray-machine-from-some-sci-fi-show?  Did anybody do any testing at all?  Will we suddenly wake up in 20 years and have grown an extra limb due to exposure in this machine?  Ack.

So now our other option is the “I’m-Taking-Extra-Care-And-Patting-You-Down-With-The-Front-Of-My-Hands-This-Time-And-I’m-Touching-Whatever-The-Blue-Blazes-I-Feel-Like-Because-You’re-Randomly-Cute.

You wonder why I bring up the Randomly Cute aspect?  TSA, the government and various pundits (I just like that word) are repeatedly assuring us that these new and improved but even more touchy-feely gropes will be done by the same sex as the traveler.  I’m sorry to have to be the one to bring this up…but has anyone thought about the gay angle here?  What if the very nice lady who is cupping my “C’s” happens to be gay?  Do ya think she might really enjoy her job?  Or this could happen to a gay man, too.  Or it could be the opposite — let the gay traveler “start” their day off right if you get my drift.  And I’m not trying to be patronizing here, I’m simply stating a fact.  And it’s a fact I’m not real thrilled about — I don’t want anyone groping me (except my husband and okay maybe Johnny Depp) but I sure don’t want someone who enjoys the company of another woman to be “fondling” my girls under the guise of security.  No.  Then it becomes not just extremely uncomfortable, AND an invasion of privacy, but a sexual attack.  And last time I heard…that was illegal.  Sheesh.

I’m never flying anywhere again…until these people come up with Plan C and just “wand” me…I will either drive to my destination or I will stay home.  But I won’t shut up about it — you can bet on that….yes I’m being slightly facetious…or am I?… sigh

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6 thoughts on “Are We Having Fun Yet?

  1. Look at that within five minutews again, and the first comment of the day. I really am looking for knighthood here.

    Looks like you spent the couple days you took off from blogging sharpening your tongue. I am in complete agreement with you on the love the “pundit” word. And the security issues being out of control. Totally out of control. I’ll too wait for the magic wand before I fly again. Being groped by a stranger is usually something I have to buy a number of drinks in order to have happen.

    Since I am in a happy relationship I don’t need to be felt up at the airport. As always I am completely behind you on this one.

    Thank you for the laugh.
    hmmm I worry about you being “behind” me… snort… lol I try not to rant and rave too often but this one just has my knickers all in a twist – I just heard they are also instituting the “serious” patdown for children too and that I find extremely disturbing. But I need to get off the soapbox now.

    Yes you are quickly currying favor (oooh I love curry) on the toknight or nottoknightIhaveaheadache list.. maybe knight-errant? Or knight-errand? Must think up quest… You can stop sucking up now – my current Knave No. 1 is off to locate the knighting sword in the Realm’s Vault o’Queenly Storage… 😉

    P.S. stop using the madqueen url u silly thing – use your blog url so you get traffic from my site. Must I teach you everything grasshopper? sheesh

  2. You always make me laugh. I wonder what the job requirement is for the body searchers? I hate that we have to take shoes, belts, watches, bracelets off before going through security – but I’m also glad the security is in place to keep me safe. Tough one. But not sure we are having fun yet …
    Sunshine xx
    Hi sweetie – I’m glad I can bring a smile to your lovely face!! I am one of those people who take their privacy and their “rights” very seriously and my “rights” are slowly being taken away from me under the guise of “security” – and that’s crap — where’s the patdown and body scanners at subways, railroad stations, bus stations, etc.? I am not convinced these measures actually keep us any safer – the TSA guy interviewed on the news show yesterday admitted that this type of equipment would never have caught the nutcase who had the bomb in his underwear as he had “powder” in his underwear. Now excuse me for being slow here, but WTH? I’m not on board with this at all. Wand me all you want – Pat me down but NO ONE touches my private pieces parts nor sees them in any way ‘cept Devoted Spouse and my doctor. shutting up now… 😉

  3. The last time I flew I was ‘patted’ down and I thought the woman performing the search was a little too familiar. It was overseas so are they TSA? Anyway, I didn’t really care since we were in full sight of dozens of people so how far could she really go? I’ll still opt for that rather than the full-body scanner anyday mainly because I wonder whether they know the long-term effects as you questioned, Linda. I have all the arms, legs and eyes that I need right now, thank you very much!
    Yeah – I was patted down in the U.K. and mentioned she was getting a little too close – she didn’t take kindly to my remark so I shut up coz I didn’t want to go to jail – but it angered me to no end I assure you. grrrr….. As for the machine I do no want to wake up in twenty years and discover one leg is suddenly 8 inches shorter than the other nor do I wish to discover my genetic make-up has been somehow altered thru the wonders of airport security technology. Twits. 😉

  4. I am just saying that if they could make the machine slow down our aging process then we would all be willing to get scanned all the time, but being as that is not the case and the dang machine cannot even help with our CRS problem then they can just shove it up someone’s arse.

    Sick with some kinda bug this week and just want to stay in bed and in the bathroom. I need to get some energy to get to the Doc’s and get my flu shot but maybe I don’t need it if I am already fighting the dang flu. I am so tired right now but cannot sleep due to breathing problems. When is this dang wheezing going to stop. My basket of pills just keeps getting bigger and bigger since I have had to add Nyquil and cough syrup to it. Really big sigh.

    God bless.

    PS….due to them finding bomb components on two airplanes, maybe they still need to work a little harder on finding a better security system. These insane terrorists truly need to be shipped to another planet so they can terrorize the infadels that live there. And maybe those aliens will squash them because they could care less about being Politically Correct. Hey I am sick of being PC and being as I am now classified as an enemy by some guy who thinks he is arrogant enough to do this then I hope I get abducted by these aliens where I will no longer have to be PC all the time. And being part Hispanic, Asian, and Native American, does this make me a traitor too? Geez, I really dislike rats.
    Hey if it doesn’t erase my wrinkles and make me taller and also get rid of CRS I’m not getting in the thing! Period! It could slowly fry my internal organs for all I know. I fixed your URL so you’re linked now sweetie – see other comments below~ Get Well!!! That’s an order! xoxo

  5. Not sure why my URL is not working. Dang wordpress thingy.
    I added your URL to the comment authorship – let’s see if it works, otherwise I’ll come back in and add it so folks can find you!

    As to earlier comment – I like the idea of shipping them all off to another planet – I’d be happy to have my taxes increased if we could get NASA behind this..okay maybe not increase my taxes, but I’d hold a car wash event for them to raise money. Snort. Stupid terrorists are really pissing me off. I’m the one who goes thru the insanity of the pat-down coz some nutcase thinks he’ll end up a martyr w/virgins all around him? Who are they kidding? I join you in being sick and tired of being politically correct. I will not be silenced on this lack of privacy and erosion of my rights issue. Even though I try not to pull politics into my blog as a rule, sometimes ya gotta speak up about what’s going on in the world – and it isn’t always funny. I will speak my mind. You know me. Can’t shut me up. 😉 Wish you’d get better swee’pea – us and our baskets of drugs – honestly I take so many meds now I rattle. Miss you – good to see you. Hang in there and take care! xoxo

  6. I agree, unless Johnny Depp gets a job at my local airport, just wand me, too.

    I’m not going through these funky body-scan machines. Besides the unkown side effects (they’ll know them soon enough when frequent flier miles include that extra leg room – for the extra leg), I always suck my stomach in because I’ve heard they see through your clothes. Through the skin? The bones? Like, where does it stop? They don’t need to see your skeleton – just underneath your clothes.

    I’ve wondered about the gay aspect, too! But I don’t care about the pat down (I do, but for the purposes of my comment, let’s say I don’t) because I picture the poor sap feeling me up. My god, the things they must find, feel and smell. I think it’d lose any ‘fun’ it may ever have had.

    Ick for all sides of this coin!

    Oh yeah, and the powder in the underwear thing – where are the dogs? As long as they’re treated right, they LOVE working and being praised. I’d rather have them sniffing my whats-its than some chick examining said area. I mean, dogs sniff you there ANYWAY. They might as well fight terrorism while they’re at it.
    They should train the dogs to bite instead of bark – that should stop a male terrorist from even attempting to hide ANYTHING in their underwear.

    Just sayin’…
    Preachin’ to the choir baby! I’m so with ya on this one. I’m all for the sniffing too (that didn’t quite come out right but you know what I mean) 😉

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