We already know from prior posts that I’m not the best tech geek. I admit that and own up to it.
The latest technology break down? My Kindle…that wonderful e-reader which holds lots of books I can keep forever thus saving me from lugging paperbacks in my purse, in luggage, or the hunt through my house for a particular book. My Kindle…I love my Kindle.
Here’s what happened… the other day as I was reading on my Kindle I took a short break to get coffee. When I returned I thought it had gone into sleep mode (where it puts a nice picture on your screen; usually of an author) but, no, it didn’t go to sleep. Instead it was doing this strange Kindle dance….it was flashing me and that’s not in the Handbook anywhere.
I did what I always do when I panic — I started pressing buttons. I hit the off switch and held it for a hard stop thinking that would stop this flashing nonsense. It didn’t. My lil Kindle (no, wait…that’s My lil Pony…nevermind) didn’t boot up or whatever you call it when the thing restarts. It kept flashing on and off. I started praying…even though I imagine this type of prayer is not high on Jesus’ list – I prayed, “Lord, I was only trying to read Your Book, c’mon gimme a hand here with this infernal blasted piece of technology please.”
And…the Kindle miraculously stopped flashing me. Unfortunately, it also stopped doing anything at all. I sat there and stared at it. Yeah…that always works when something goes wrong…just stare at it. And then…my beloved Kindle went to its Home Screen — ya know that logo of a big tree with someone sitting under it reading a book – rather Newtonian but without the apples. The little bar at the bottom started to move, which I thought was a good sign. Maybe it was doing that synch thing where it updates Kindle stuff. I waited for it to finish that process and I turned it off again.
I turned it back on and found this: an empty Kindle. It had not only synched, it had sinked (okay I know that should be sunk, but gimme some leeway here). I had all my collections lined up neatly but there were no books to be found. My newest classics were gone, my 2 latest vampire stories vanished, my latest historical mystery (the third in a series I truly enjoy) – nope, not there. Even the book I got talked into reading by a blogger friend (Ulysses by James Joyce) (all 1,000 pages ack) had disappeared.
Time to look for the manual which, surprisingly enough, was still loaded on the Kindle. I waded through the troubleshooting section only to find out there was no answer for this particular issue. Crap squared. Off to my laptop and out to Amazon dot com for some tech help. Thirty minutes later I learned that this happens some times and it’s normal. My definition of normal does not include this issue. I was beginning to get irked. (read: I was shaking this thing and screaming at it with foul threats of electronic death) I followed every step in the instructions while my Kindle continued what I think was its sympathy strike for the French union workers…
I performed the “Restart” maneuver three times. Wireless on; Wireless off …I felt like I was trapped in a bad car wax commercial. On the fourth Restart the time corrected itself. It was no longer 3:34 am but (correctly) 7:34 am. Still, I had no books; no Archive.
I got more coffee. Then my Kindle and I engaged in a serious discussion. I explained I was giving it one more chance to return my books and then it was the S-L-E-D-G-E-H-A-M-M-E-R. The strangest thing happened.
It started…the time was correct…and every one of my books including the 29 in the Archives magically reappeared. Apparently a Kindle needs to be reminded of the rules, and given the choice to work or visit Mr. Sledgehammer (which is the 21st century version of being taken behind the woodshed).
I’m naming this Electronic Peace effort the Dayton Kindle Accords – there’s peace in my house again and I can read….sigh…