Happy Days? Nah, Not So Much…

 

 

It’s that time of year again…I’m being pelted with emails announcing my high school reunion.  So many Spartans (yes, we chose some strange warriors with kitchen brushes on their helmets as our forever-logo) have been “located” and now is the time to sign up for the Re-aquaintance Cocktail Party to be followed by The Big Dinner the next night. 

No, no, no and mmmmm I don’t think so.  I have never attended a reunion and I’m not about to start now.  I have kept in touch with…lemme count now…oh yes, two people from high school; one of which I really don’t even care about for personal reasons I can’t discuss on this blog.  The other was my very best friend, Janie, and I FaceBook with her.  That’s it.  No one else.  Why would I want to go back and revisit four of the worst years of my life?  Teen angst surfaces even as I write this post.  Eww…gym class with those horried blue uniforms and the slightly off kilter gym teacher (’nuff said).  Quick showers and Right Guard spray.  It makes my brain ache.

High school….boys…I dated a guy named Ronnie.  I just had the best time with him and what did he do?  He went all gay on me.  Can you imagine how that made me feel?  Oh I got over it.  And we remained friends for many years up until he became ill and died from AIDS.  Then there was a guy, Greg, who actually gave me a ring and asked me to “go steady” with him.  What an antiquated term…”going steady.”  We lasted 3 days and I returned the ring.  I was horrible at dating and relationships. I actually dated a boy named Maynard.  Maynard!!!  He was a nice guy, too.  But the name killed me.   High school….it’s why therapists get rich.

I almost flunked out of Home Economics.  How does anyone do that you ask?  I couldn’t sew a zipper — I couldn’t do it.  Finally, on my 12th or 13th try, the stepmonster did it for me and we just put the entire ugly experience behind us.  I truly wanted to go to Shop and learn how to do neat things to a car engine but at that time girls had to cook and sew and boys got the fun stuff.  I complained loudly and constantly ended up in either the Principal or Vice Principal’s office for making such a fuss.  The big mouth I have today?  Yeah, it was in evidence back then, too.

My Biology teacher was the strangest woman I have ever met.  She used to stand up in front of the class and sing the theme to the Mickey Mouse Club to us and she had this jar on her desk with heaven knows what in it.  The day came for me to dissect the frog and I flat-out refused.  Nope – not gonna do it.  Back to the Vice Principal’s office and his only remark to me was…”Oh God, not you again?”  Got through that class with a C-.  Then there was Algebra where I was given a D just so the teacher didn’t have to see me the following year.

I loathed high school.  I was not a cheerleader. I hated studying.  I wasn’t really a “joiner.”  I did not hang out with the cool kids. I did have boys on my brain, though.  I had a crush on a guy named Luc who used to sit behind me in History class .  And then this surfer guy from California moved into town – his name was (I kid you not) Woody and he also showed up in my History class.  I barely passed History that year.  I wasn’t the studious type — I think you see the trend here. 

Actually, I had a few  friends I hung out with  but I was somewhat of a daredevil and a clown and that simply led to my always being in trouble for one thing or another.  As I recall, I was not a member of any of the little cliques – I ended up in Glee Club and the Spanish Club for gawd’s sake — and the Spanish teacher had a thing for me.  Yes I was able to read what he wrote in my yearbook even if it WAS in Espanol — he wanted to go to la playa (the beach) with me.  Talk about your nightmares…

I was forced by the father and the stepmonster to take typing and shorthand.  Oh puhleeze – what a miserable thing to do to a young girl.  I sat in that class while this bug-eyed little woman yelled at me because I kept the cap on my “real” fountain pen.  She actually stabbed me in the arm one day with her own pen.  Scarred me for life in more ways than one.  I could take dictation at 120 words a minute, though, so I guess she was an adequate teacher.  Nasty human being.  

There was only one class in which I excelled — can you guess?  Yup – English.  All four years English was my favorite, especially English Lit.  One English teacher opened the class with that old standby “I Am.”  “Now write.”  I had so much fun with that one; creative writing was my only love.   That’s my one good memory of high school.  Pitiful.

And you think I want to go see these people after all these years?  Not on your life.  Not even after I have lost 40 pounds and look absolutely stunning would I pay the exorbitant price to walk into those rooms and face people I don’t even remember and who will not remember me.  I actually pulled out the yearbooks the other day and went through them.  Out of an entire class I recognized maybe 20??

I refuse to put Devoted Spouse through the tedium as a group of 50-somethings sit around and reminisce about who was Prom Queen and Prom King.  Crap on a crutch, I went to my Junior year prom with a loser who reeked of cigarettes and he ditched ME there!   I wasn’t asked to Senior Prom.  (Here’s where my 12 faithful readers all say…awww poor baby…)  snort.

I sound like a broken Amy Winehouse song…Wanna Make Me Go To Reunion and I say no, no, no.

Besides…someone might tell Devoted Spouse some of the crap I used to pull and he has such a high opinion of me.  I would hate to topple off my pedestal in front of him with my tiara hanging around my knees somewhere.  I’ll just remember that high school was simply a part of life I had to go through and leave it at that.

I truly wish my fellow West Springfield High Schoolers a fabulous time as they stroll down memory lane  — I’ll stay here and suck a Diet Pepsi through my nose for kicks…sigh…

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11 thoughts on “Happy Days? Nah, Not So Much…

  1. High school reunions! Oh my! I’m trying to get over the fact that this is my 20 year College reunion and I went back to college as a “mature” student!
    Don’t talk to me about how many years it’s been – I was a “mature” college student too! Still tryin’ to figure out what I want to do when I grow up! lol

  2. I did go to my Ten Year. What a joke. I had married, moved 3,000 miles away, divorced and returned and these people were still the back stabbing, gum chewing snobs they had always been. OMG. Thanks but no thanks.
    I couldn’t have said it better sweetie! There is simply no point in playing the “who’s been more successful game” nor do I wish to look at a bunch of bald heads and botoxed faces. snort! To me had these people wanted to remain friends with me they would have been in touch with me over the years and vice versa. After all this time, I simply have nothing to say to them. Ick. 😉 miss ya – say hi to the Hubs for me (I think of you everytime I wear my adorable yellow tee!!! and use my fabulous cozie!) I had such a lovely time @ ur place – it was just a shame my back was so danged wonky on me. Pet the lil furry ones for me! xoxo

    1. So, does this mean you won’t go to Devoted Spouse’s 50th. I’d be disappointed if you missed it.
      no sweetie – Devoted Spouse is trying to make arrangements now – he’s waited so long I dunno where we will be staying yet or when we’ll arrive but we’ll get there and we’ll hook up. 😉
  3. I skipped school once because I couldn’t find a place to park. Didn’t miss a thing.
    I skipped school constantly – even “borrowing” cars to do it…I didn’t miss anything either but I almost didn’t graduate. yikes. I was trouble with a big T!!! 😉

  4. I’m with you girl. No one would remember me anyway. I moved between my junior and senior year…
    I’m thinking of what I can do around the house with all the money I’ll save by skipping this “event” – I think at the very least, a new couch is in my future. lol

  5. Seriously, we are leading parallel lives. Mostly. I enjoyed high school and was a popular cheerleader although I went through my entire 4 years at AHS and was never ONCE asked out on a date by guys from my school. Tons of male friends, though, who would call me at Prom time and tell me there was something important they wanted to ask me and I’d be all, “Yes! Yes!” and they’d ask me if I thought So-and-So would want to go to the Prom with them and I’d be all, “What. The. Heck.” and the day after the Prom they’d call back and tell me they had a lousy time and should have taken me instead. Ya think? Bitter? Me? Nah.

    However, I have never had any desire to go to any of the reunions and after 30+ years, I really have no desire to renew friendships that ended when I graduated and moved away.

    Oh, and I was a lazy student. I passed algebra by beating the teacher at backgammon. That was the only way I was going to pass that class.

    Dammit why didn’t I think of the backgammon angle? Crap….

  6. I have never gone to a reunion either! Never will. I hated high school, except for my Eng lit teacher. I was madly in love with him. 🙂 I graduated with 5 years of English instead of 4. I also wanted to take shop, but my parents said no. Why do you want to learn about cars when you have 3 brothers who can help you! Hello where are they now? I get a yearly brochure on the happenings at Bay High and I tear it up and throw it away.
    Wow are we online sisters or what?! I’m so glad u stopped by sweetie – xoxo

  7. I don’t have very good memories of senior school either, I met Emily there and we are still absolute best friends eight years on so thats one good thing.

    We don’t have reunions or proms here in the UK which is quite a shame although like you I don’t think I would go anyway.

    We used to have this tradition where on the last day of term we all brought flour and eggs to school and would pelt each other in the playground. Emily tipped a whole bag of flour on my head once and rubbed eggs into my hair, You should have seen the mess I was in when I got home. Those are happy memories 🙂
    Glad I’m not the only one here suffering through yukky school memories. I do like the flour and egg thing, though – that sounds like soooo much fun. The most fun I had was throwing toilet paper (a practice we here in the states call “tp-ing”) all around a rival high school, but then a kid from that rival high school actually ran into me with his car – that was so not fun – I wasn’t hurt but it scared the crap outta me. Oh yeah for Seniors almost at graduation time I seem to remember something called Senior Skip Week where we pretty much just skipped whenever we wanted and went to one of the local hang-outs and caused trouble. I believe by that time I was associating with some not so savory kids and got roped into going on a cruise with them as they stole a VW bus, parked it in the woods, and actually using Day-Glo paint, they put their handprints all over the bus. Well, it was fun and exciting but I’m not completely stupid – I didn’t do the handprint thing….long story short, at least one of them ended up in jail for car theft and a few other charges – me? I ran like hell and got outta there. Ah yes, my ill-spent youth…..how I am alive today is anybody’s guess… lol

  8. Aren’t reunions where you’re supposed to go show off that you’ve become a normal, successful person? And good looking to boot! 😉 I guess if you don’t care to do so then there’s no point in going….
    Hmmm….hello sweetie…how to answer this without sounding off. I’m uncomfortable going up to people who are virtual strangers and recounting my life successes and showing my vanity == I think it’s pointless to go to something where you haven’t kept in contact with the people and so many years have passed. It then BECOMES a bragging session and I don’t play that game — I’m not interested in what careers have been chosen, how many marriages have ended in divorce or who uses Botox. The people I care about from those days FB me and we keep in touch – they are proud of me for ME, and I don’t need to show off. Does that make any sense?

  9. I will miss you there….was hoping to see ya….
    Sweetie-pie – you were the ONLY reason I even considered going in the first place. But it’s too much money, and even with the 40 pounds I’ve lost, my back still is not up for the trip back and forth to DC and the hotel room bed. We’ll find a way to meet up again, don’t worry. And until we do, we have FB. Send my regards to Mark Hancock 😉 I fondly remember the pink mustang. xoxo

  10. Speaking for myself, I didn’t care for most of those in my class then, why would I want to see them 35 years later?
    Again, I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels this way – we haven’t kept in touch and I have nothing in common with them – so why spend the time and money??? 😉

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