Once upon a time in a land far away (okay it was Belgium) there lived a lady who was always getting into a fix. Sometimes she had a difficult time getting out of the fix.
One particular time she found herself on a plane from New York to Brussels, Belgium. At the time the lady’s Devoted Spouse was a Colonel in the United States Air Force. Stationed in Belgium (the southern part which is truly the armpit of the world, no offense intended to all of you who hail from Belgium…but it’s true), the lovely lady often needed to get to the States and back to Belgium again…hence this particular day and this particular flight.
The lovely damsel had a ticket for Business Class; that amazing section in front of Cargo….where one is actually served fresh fruit and all kinds of lovely food on real china with real silverware. The lady had a nice seat which was very comfy but, unfortunately, her seatmate had a slight…hmmmm…how shall I gently put this? Aw crap – he smelled like a goat. It was going to be a long 7-hour flight and this damsel was in distress. She inquired sweetly of the flight attendant “Are there any other empty seats I might take?” The flight attendant smiled kindly and said she would check. She never returned.
Shortly thereafter, the damsel looked several aisles ahead of her and was amazed to find her Devoted Spouse’s boss, The General and he was waving at the damsel! Gasp! The General!!! On the same flight! “Hi Linda!” The General bellowed across the aisles in the direction of the damsel in distress back in her smelly location. “Hey!” “There’s an empty seat up here, c’mon up and sit with me!” The damsel was both elated and horrified at the same time. She so wanted to get away from smelly man and yet to sit in the presence of Devoted Spouse’s boss The General was just slightly intimidating. She grabbed her purse and flew up front like nobody’s business and plopped her cute self down in the available window seat next to The General.
The flight was delightful — the two fast friends snacked, watched a movie, took naps, had lovely conversations, and read books together and the 7 hours flew by. Suddenly the plane was landing in Brussels and it was time to disembark.
Walking together through the airport, the lovely damsel and The General approached their parties simultaneously; the damsel approached her waiting Colonel; The General strode up to his military Aide. When asked by her Devoted Spouse…”How was your trip?” the aforementioned damsel responded with…”Well now I know what it’s like to sleep with a General.”
Horror ensued. The look on the Aide’s face was one of total shock; the look on the damsel’s Colonel (possibly-soon-to-be-Airman-First-Class-because-of-his-wife’s-stupid-mouth) was one that cannot be described. There are not enough descriptive words in the English language to fully explain to you the look on that man’s face.
The General laughed and the damsel laughed, both realizing it was a very funny remark and that damsel was a very witty woman indeed. The military Aide and the accompanying Devoted Spouse Colonel just kept on walking and looking straight ahead.
What you may ask has this to do with Theme Thursday? It was the closest BRUSH the damsel ever had with divorce…sigh…
Other Theme Thursday posts are here