There’s an article out from eHarmony Advice (not that I’m interested in dating, but it was on my internet news …oh nevermind) about what not to say on a first date. They listed 6 things…and while they are all things I agree one shouldn’t bring up…I think eHarmony missed a few that are equally important. That first date leaves a lasting impression you know.
According to eHarmony the six No-No’s (in no particular order) are:
1. Let me tell you about my ex.
2. How do you feel about big church weddings?
3. Have you had any work done?
4. I’ve never had much luck with dating.
5. So how much do you earn?
6. Sorry I’m late but I forgot my meds.
While all of the above are excellent topics to steer clear of during that first night out on the town, I think it’s important to discuss the issues we all deal with and get them right there out in the open and up front. That way all the baggage is on the table, so to speak, and you can go on to enjoy a lovely evening together. So I would include the following questions/topics shortly after you introduce yourself to your date…
- I live with my mother.
- Excuse me for a minute please; I have a little leakage I need to take care of, but I’ll be right back.
- OMG I forgot to put in my bridge…well I just won’t order corn on the cob.
- Well of course that’s my service animal…cats can be helpful too you know (while stuffing cat back in handbag)
- Sorry, I’m a bit flatulent this evening…(placing bottle of Beano on table)
- Is that your real hair?
- Don’t you just ADORE Justin Bieber?
- Look! I can make my eyes bulge out whenever I like. Cool, huh?
- Is that Mel Gibson over at that table? I’d love to have a man like that in my life
- I only had to spend the one night in jail but it was no big deal and I really wasn’t stalking her I assure you
- I’m sure you can find a good dermatologist to fix that
- Can you believe these shoes are orthopedic?? I found them online and such a deal!
Oh these are just a few things I think should be gotten out of the way early — I imagine you could come up with more. I’m happy I’m not on the market — see when you’re married you no longer have to worry about this stuff – except maybe for that leakage issue…sigh…