DISCLAIMER: This is a humor blog & I am about to make fun of someone & their body parts. Get over it. It’s what I do.
My local paper informs me that the famously full family also known as the Duggars would be pleased as punch to welcome Baby No. 20 into the fold…the famously full fold.
Are you kidding me? After Baby No. 19 came out screamie preemie??? Do they not realize this poor woman has been barefoot and pregnant for most of her adult life now?
I wonder….does she use some type of device or suspenders or a womb harness to prop up that tired uterus so it doesn’t hang down to her knees coz it sure as heck can’t be springing back every time….not after 18 passages the size of a watermelon (and one small exception in teeny tiny No. 19). No wonder she’s always in a long dress. Think stretch — same as elastic — it only goes so far for so long. It’s called excess wear and tear compounded by gravity. Womb Droop. Serious problem. Hard to wear Daisy Dukes when you have a severe case of Womb Droop.
I’m picturing a discussion between her fallopian tubes as they plot how to push those eggs back up where they belong coz the uterus is begging…..Noooooo…..Nooooooo….. not again….anything but this. Let’s send her some of those Scrubbing Bubble guys to keep the womb walls nice and clean so no eggs stick and end up fertilized by the swimmers we know Dude Duggar keeps cranking out.
Ya’ll remember how Walton Mountain good-nights were enough to make you wanna poke your eyes out? Imagine the good nights in the Dugger house. They all start with the letter J….maybe they say Good Night J-1 to J-19 and they’re done with it. Sounds like a Bingo game gone wrong. How do you remember that many names? I bet they mumble them under their breath.
If they pop one more out I suggest the name Jello coz that’s what that poor lady’s insides must be like by now…sigh