Sometimes The Beauty Thing Just Isn’t Worth It

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Sunday morning I was getting ready for church.  Now my church isn’t fancy; most of us show up in jeans (preferably clean) and a few people dress in business attire but you rarely see someone in a fancy dress or a suit.  We like to think that God accepts us as we are and He doesn’t care what we are wearing; He cares that we are there worshipping Him.

So,  I cleaned myself up and put on a nice shirt and a clean pair of jeans.  Now I don’t leave the house (okay I did once and it was a catastrophic traumatic experience) without putting on the face spackle and at least trying to give the illusion of a quasi-youthful face and nicely styled hair.  There I am in our bathroom while Devoted Spouse is steaming up the room from the shower and I’m getting closer and closer to the mirror to put on some basic eye makeup.  I gave up on the eye-liner nonsense after my accident last year because my hand tends to shake and there is nothing worse in the world than a middle-aged woman with crooked eye-liner all over the top third of her face.  Gah…

But I like to put a little shadow on and I always make sure my eyebrows look nice (d’ya know that as a lady ages her eyebrows start to disappear?  I’ve been looking all over the house for those danged things lately to no avail).  I was almost done and realized my few eyelashes left (yet another casualty of menopause) needed some sprucing up.  Out came the magic wand of mascara.  The first swipe went right into my eye.  OW – I mean that wand stuck itself smack dab into my eye – I completely missed those silly little lashes completely.  Thankfully, I didn’t scratch a cornea or do any damage but simply ended up with a sore eye and black mascara smeared in places it’s not supposed to be applied.

I’ve thought about false eyelashes — I used to wear them when I was one of those pretty, young things, and they are a lot of work to apply correctly and make them look natural by blending.  And one evening I was watching the evening news and I looked at Diane Sawyer and her false eyelashes and thought to myself, “She’s got two weird black feathery things sticking to her eyes;” they didn’t look natural at all, I expected them to get up and walk across her face at any moment like some furry caterpillars.  Ick.    I gave up on the idea of false eyelashes.

I’m all for beauty products; I buy them and I use them.  Judiciously.  A little goes a long way.  I don’t want an orange bronzer face and although I love her dearly, I simply don’t want Diane Sawyer eyes.  And from now on, I promise not  to put on my eye makeup in a steamy bathroom.  Sigh…


7 thoughts on “Sometimes The Beauty Thing Just Isn’t Worth It

  1. I agree, as you get older, less is more. Wish I could say the same about my waistline.
    My waistline is decreasing thank you – I’m really working on it. The makeup is decreasing, too, LOL

  2. I’m right there with you girl. A little eyeliner, mascara, a bit of shadow and I’m out the door. Oh and if I’m gett ‘all made up’ some foundation and eyebrows:)
    I think the older I get the more I just don’t want to mess with all of it. I like the girly stuff – I love going to Sephora and trying out all the wonderful makeup but I’m too lazy to actually wear all that stuff – I save all the heavy-duty fancy-schmancy makeup for when I get all dolled up and we’re goin out for a night on the town. I think the last one was 1997…LOL

  3. I have a thing about my eyes, can’t bear anyone or anything to go near them. When you wrote about your mascara brush touching your eye it make my tummy go all funny. 🙂

    I know all too well the fun of a misty bathroom, made all the more fun when there are two of us fighting over the mirror.
    Devoted Spouse has same issue with eyes – I used to wear contact lenses and it made him ill to watch me put them in or take them out. Funny the things that bother us, huh?

  4. Crone,
    I feel ya honey. I will say this that eyelash growing syrum works. I had 3 eyelashes left between my two eyes. Wait that would make them eyebrows anyway… I used the stuff for like 2 weeks and I actually had long lush luxurious lashes. I could go without mascara and have eyelashes it was amazing. Then my eye doctor told me that it was what they gave glacoma patients and that I would get dark around my eyes. Well then there was a quandry…do I want lashes or do I want to look like someone punched me in the eyes.
    I guess you know which one I chose because they just call me Rocky Racoon now. 🙂
    Hey Rocky – I have considered that, but I have limited vision in one eye and if anything should happen to my good eye I would be declared legally blind so I truly can’t take the chance that I might have an allergic reaction to the stuff – it’s why I had to stop wearing contact lenses. I will just suffer the horrors of trying to put on mascara. LOL

  5. Well…..I hate to say this, but I often (always) leave the house with nothing on. OH….make-up that is.
    Sweetie if you can get away with it, more power to ya. I gotta put at least a light layer of spackle on. Went out last week without any on and hair not at its best and dressed in sweats, and of course I ran into not one but 3 people I knew – and one even asked me if I was feeling okay. snort – I must look like crap on toast without makeup. sigh…

  6. I rarely wear any make-up, maybe once in a while I put the spackle on, well that is if I remember to care, because I suffer from CRS and just forget to put any on. I figure I did good if I remembered to get dressed. I mean the last feel times that I forgot to get dressed and people were looking at me kinda funny, made me put a mirror by the front door. I put it there to make sure that I would check to see if I had clothes on. The only problem is that with the CRS problem, I forget to look in the mirror.

    I now know why men are all of a sudden sitting up straighter and taller inside their cars, they are trying to get a good view of the wee ones.

    Okay, just kidding, at least I think I am. Maybe I have and I just forgot that I forgot the clothes.

    Anyway, I have noticed that my hairline is receding, eyebrows, what eyebrows. I did find the eyelashes the other day, or was it a chin hair that I pulled out. Dang it, I couldn’t tell.

    So the big question is: Why is it that we are losing the hair where we want it and growing new hairs where we do not?

    I enjoy putting on make-up the few times a year that I bother, but I hate taking it off so much that I hate putting it on. Yeah, makes no sense to me either. Although spackle does work wonders. Oh I was blessed with beautiful skin, so rarely have bothered with face make-up. Eyes made up to the hilt, but face usually only had blush. Gotta keep those pores clean.

    God bless.
    There ya go – it’s the taking all that crap off that is a pain in the butt. Wipe, wipe, wipe, scrub, scrub, toner, toner, then moisturize and I’m exhausted. So I never wear the face spackle when I’m just at home – but always when I leave the house to go out coz I guarantee you the day I don’t is the day I run into somebody and there I am looking like death warmed over on a soda cracker. Gah…

    Wait a minute…pls tell me you didn’t leave the house without clothes on? I thought I had CRS…yikes woman!

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