That Blank Look On My Face Does Indeed Have a Meaning, Dear

I’ve discussed communications in a marriage before.  I have another example I want to share with ya’ll.  This won”t take long but it’s a good thing to know.

Devoted Spouse now has another volunteer job at our church — one afternoon a week he goes to one of our branch churches and hangs out around the computer lab in case someone using a computer has a problem.  He does this for about 3 hours at a time – usually from around 3pm to 6pm.

Coincidentally on the same day he has this volunteer position I attend a class at church which starts at 7 pm meaning I leave my house around 6:40 or so.  So sometimes I see him come in as I am leaving and sometimes we miss each other.

This evening he walks into the house earlier than usual — in fact I was scarfing down a really bad chicken pot pie as he arrived.  He said and I quote:  “Reinforcement arrived early.”

I looked at him with the thousand-yard stare and said (using my ultra large vocabulary), “Huh?”

He repeated…”Reinforcement arrived early.”

One more time, I stared at him as my eyes glazed over and said, “What?”

I truly had no flippin’ idea what his statement meant.  Really.  What was being reinforced and why was it here early?

I finally in total frustration probably raised my voice just a tad and said something to the effect of , “What the crap are you talking about?”  What reinforcement — is the Cavalry here?”  WTH?

What he meant was that someone at the church had arrived to take his place at the next shift so he could come home early.  Well why in the blue blazes didn’t he just say that?  Because he thought I would understand his shortened version.

I didn’t.  I walked away in total frustration thinking that, yes, I had gone over the edge because I couldn’t understand a simple statement made by Devoted Spouse.

Later I simply requested of him…”The next time you say something to me and I give you the thousand-yard stare, for the love of Gawd, don’t keep repeating what you already said.  Find another way to express yourself so I understand what you are trying so hard to tell me.”

Discussion over.  Communication failure solved.

Sometimes it’s the simple stuff that is the hardest.


14 thoughts on “That Blank Look On My Face Does Indeed Have a Meaning, Dear

  1. Me, myself would have been worried that he was talking about the pie! But,I’m paranoid.
    Now that’s funny! Thanks for stopping by. 🙂

  2. MOG! This just happened to me and ELPH! After the 3rd repeat I said “So the mermaids are vacationing on Mars?” He said ‘WTH are you talking about?” I said “Exactly!” We both cracked up!
    what the heck is goin on lately?? We just keep saying ‘Huh’ to each other all the time! Cracks me up so bad. Must be part of the winter doldrums – or I need that brain transplant after all.

  3. I agree with Anne. I thought he was referring to you and that chicken pot pie…maybe that he was referring to himself as the “reinforcement”, and that he was here to put a stop to all that eating. 🙂
    Now wait a minute I’ll have u know the chicken pot pie was one of the tiny ones and I only ate part of it and threw the rest out – it pretty much sucked anyway. LOL I was hoping my new translator app on my SmartPhone would help – but it failed me too. giggles

  4. Speaking of communication, you know what my pet peeve is? It’s when my Partner insists on never clarifying who he is talking about. He throws around all these pronouns he, she, they…and it confuses me. We get into arguments because he thinks I’m not listening carefully enough!
    I don’t have that issue coz DS doesn’t talk much about other people. Wait…he doesnt talk much period. Talking is my forte. And come to think of it…he doesn’t listen either. Hey, now I’m getting peeved. ROFL

  5. LOL! Hey, at least he talks to you…mine grunts and scratches…
    Love that you BOTH volunteer…in church!
    Oh he grunts and scratches, too, I just dont usually bring that up and now that I have… oops. 🙂

  6. I have the exact same problem with Emms. She is a really keen photographer and keeps asking me to pass weird things like a 200mm zoom lense ring converter. Then gets ratty when I give her a blank stare.

    Yet when I make perfectly clear statements like the twiddley thing has come off the car again she has no idea what I am talking about.

    Everyone knows twiddley things are volume control knobs.
    Well of course we all know what twiddly things are. ROFL My problem w/Devoted Spouse (or maybe it’s his problem with ME) is that when I start to talk I will temporarily blank out on a word and start using my hands to describe what I’m trying to say and we end up playing Charades and falling down laughing all because I can’t think of a stupid word. I’m glad I’m not the only one with communication issues. 🙂

  7. I am married to a man who has a habit of mumbling as he is walking away from me or is in another room and who gets mad because I can’t understand him. I have hearing issues to begin with (if there’s any background noise, all I hear is Charlie Brown’s teacher talking.) so the whole mumbling from another room doesn’t help our communication issues. I now answer his mumbled questions with “May I mombo dogface to the banana patch?”

    See how HE likes not understanding what someone says. So there!
    I like it! It’s just the opposite with us – Devoted Spouse has hearing issues and he gets so mad at me when I have my back to him and I’m just talking away because even with hearing aids he can’t always catch what I’m saying. Lesson to me!

  8. They think they are so clever.

    Just reading your response above: My husband is deaf in one ear and can’t hear out of the other. For years I have said GET A HEARING AID. But lately I am rethinking that because if he does, he will hear my muttering behind his back.
    heh heh heh

  9. DH will say something to me about what is going on, on the TV, while I’m working on the computer or have my nose buried in a book. And, he expects me to answer him with some reasonable connection as to what he’s commented on–the dear, dear fool. Drives me straight up a wall.

    “Do I look as though I know WTH you are talking about? Am I watching the show? What? Huh?”
    again, pretty much the opposite with us. I have said for years he has selective hearing loss. Even with hearing aids he hears what he wants to hear. lol

  10. Okay, I have the same issues with my DS (except for the physical hearing issues) but I have to tell you a story about being careful what you say when you don’t understand something. My friend’s 5 year old son was not cleaning up his toys in the living room as asked. So he was sent to his room. Now both sets of grandparents were visiting and in the living room. The son came stomping out of his room, pointed to everyone in the room and announced “Go f*&*k yourselves”. Everyone was stunned, but my friend’s husband said “What did you say?” Now the son starts behaving and does what his father asked…repeated what he had said. Oops.
    Holey moley never ask a 5 yr old to repeat himself! What a hoot!

  11. I understood perfectly what DS meant. I guess I’m the odd one out here. LMAO…

    I have a hubby who is ALMOST deaf in one ear. So he knows what it is like not to be able to hear, right? I never talk to him from the kitchen when he is in the living room, because I know I’ll just have to repeat myself. Noooo, I go into the living room, stop in front of him and wait til I have his attention, then I enunciate and talk loud the first time so I don’t have to repeat myself. And he says “huh?” Sometimes I want to rip his head off. PAY ATTENTION TO ME SO I DON’T HAVE TO SAY IT TWICE. The kicker? He will yell at ME from the living room to the kitchen and expect me to hear and understand every word. OR when we’re in the car, he’ll mumble when he’s talking to me, and I’m expected to hear and understand — hell, he probably can’t even hear himself!

    Oh sweetie we’re singing the same song here aren’t we? LOL

  12. Men….{sigh}…..can’t kill ’em gotta love ’em.
    I know but they need to come with an electronic translator which could immediate say something to the effect of “What he Meant to say was…” LOL

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