What’s All The Flush About?

In keeping with my plans on living a healthier lifestyle, I have gathered a few new cookbooks for my collection.  One of these is a Crockpot cookbook filled with simple and fairly healthy meals.  I like healthy and I am soooo in favor of simple.  With the exception of Thanksgiving, if I can’t throw dinner together with a minimum amount of effort, cost, and time, I’m not going to cook.  When I saw this Crockpot cookbook and managed to snag it (with coupons and special offers) for less than $10 on Amazon.com I knew that I would soon be dragging the Crockpot out of the basement. While there are definite pros for Crockpot cooking there are some cons, too.

For the last three days I have made simple recipes and let the Crockpot do the work. First up was a ham and pinto beans concoction of my own.  Uh-oh guess who was out of Beano?  Later that evening, while on the couch with EmmaLou, Golden Destroyer, watching some tv she turned around, gave me a hateful look and got off the couch.  She subsequently left the room entirely.  Oops.  My bad.  Devoted Spouse was on the other side of the room in a fog all his own.  My friend @auntchrisbronx on Twitter  would have Tweeted this as a #cheesecutters moment no doubt.

Next I made a vegetarian curry w/garbanzo beans – an okay meal, but no prize winner.  Although it was full of yummy veggies and plenty of curry, coriander, cayenne and other spices, it just wasn’t flavorful enough.  Sorry Crockpot cookbook, next time I need to play around with that recipe before I make it.  Unfortunately, this meal  had pretty much the same result as the ham and pinto beans.  EmmaLou left in disgust.  And, that’s saying a lot because this dog is queen of the silent and deadly vinegar toots.  Those puppies sneak up on you and literally take your breath away, while she lays there sleeping contentedly.  She left me.  I just snickered.  Payback’s a b*tch, EmmaLou.

Tonight on the agenda is Salsa Chicken – this time with black beans.   So far, all the menus this week contain beans.   I’m thinking I should have planned these menus with a little more thought on my part.  I don’t know what may happen later tonight but I’m hoping the foundation of this house is sturdy – heaven knows the water pipes are getting a workout.

Luckily, Devoted Spouse made a Sam’s run the other day because there has been a “run”  on the usage of toilet paper in this household and we may be in for another couple of days of, how shall I put it?  Ahhh… fiber disposal.  Yeah – we’re flushing like nobody’s business and I can’t wait to see the quarterly water bill.  I’m afraid they may call us to make sure we don’t have a leak somewhere.  Then again the water folks love people who eat beans.

By the time I’m done with this week’s Crockpot experiment, we may have no, ummm, intestinal fortitude left.  My doctor tells me a clean colon is a happy colon.  I may loan him my Crockpot cookbook.


11 thoughts on “What’s All The Flush About?

  1. oh my goodness tears came to my eyes from laughing, Ok just imagine if I had this cookbook with a family of 5 and it is winter and I don’t want to open any windows but then again there would be quite a bit of warm “air” circulating ..
    I’m tellin ya I gotta read these recipes more carefully and plan some space between the ones with so much fiber in them – it’s killing us. ROFL

  2. Reminds me of when I went to pick up my daughter when she was 2, from the at-home day care she attended. The lady who cared for her was laughing when I got there. She said she smelled something and asked “Heather, did you poop?” and Heather said “no, just cut the cheese.”
    Atta girl!

  3. I barely could finish reading this due to all the water running, uh I mean flushing, out of my eyes.

    Living here in the refried bean capital of the world, we know that you must soak your beans at least 24 hours to uh, avoid the cheese cutting phase.

    Although sometimes we do end up eating beans that haven’t been soaked and all the windows have to be opened, no matter how cold or hot it is outside.

    Although in your case, getting even with the Golden Destroyer is worth eating unsoaked beans.

    That was just too funny, and had to read again about her leaving the room. Still ROFLMAO as tears continue falling. Grabbing the box of Kleenex…..

    God bless.
    HEY the instructions say to soak the beans OVERNIGHT and that’s what I did – you mean I need to really soak the crap (oops, sorry) outta them for 24 hours??? I never heard of such a thing. Must take this under serious consideration. You do realize of course that I’m exaggerating – the trick to adding more fiber in your diet (like beans) is to do it gradually and we have been. But it’s always fun to laugh about toots (my sense of humor is definitely not highbrow – gimme potty humor anyday). Hugs!

  4. Pay backs are wonderful, aren’t they?

    I made BBQ roast beef for sandwiches last week in the crockpot and they turned out fabulous! Love my crockpot.
    Crockpots are wonderful inventions. Tonight is beef and noodles night – stew meat simmered in red wine & spices then put over whole grain noodles. Yum yum. Hey wait — no beans? EmmaLou gets a reprieve. That should make her rest easier. LOL

  5. As a vegetarian I eat a lot of beans. Guess what? The more you eat the less you toot. The build up is a killer though.
    We’re getting used to it slowly. It’s part of my new healthier outlook – more fiber, more veggies, more fruit, less meat, you know the drill. 🙂

  6. Don’t forget to try my crock pot Rueben casserole. I typed crock pot recipes into my web search one day and found more crock pot recipes than I could possibly make in my lifetime.

    Poor EmmaLou Gavin and Patty had the same problem here a week or so ago when I made crock pot Boston beans. They were good! I had no trouble with them but DH had the toots.
    Your recipe is on my list – I’ll make it for me when Devoted Spouse can eat leftovers – he doesn’t like Reubens – hates swiss cheese – he can be a little fussy. The man hates eggs and he hates mushrooms – makes it hard to cook – I have to sneak those things in where I can. LOL

  7. I do own a crockpot. I use it for taking burn marks off my jewelry after I solder it. As for the magical fruit…it is not my friend. So perhaps my crockpot and I should just remain acquaintances…and not friends.
    Hello dahlink – Hmmm wonder if it would dry socks. Hafta look into that. I suddenly can’t live w/out my crockpot and my George Foreman Grill is getting seriously pissed off. That George. I’m gonna back off a little on the bean recipes, though.

  8. I can’t get enough of your honesty!! Love your page..keep em’ coming 🙂
    thank you sweetie! I’ll try – but class starts soon so the posts won’t be here every day – sorry – school comes first!!

  9. heh heh heh
    This freezing cold weather has been great for us dogs. Moms all around the world are cooking hot tasty meals. My own Mom has been using her slow-cooker.
    I’m sure “Emms” loves it when you cook at home.
    Think: Table Scraps
    hello precious little sniffin thang. “Emms” used to get lots of leftovers and table scraps and then one day the vet said STOP and we had to quit feeding her people food. People food is for people. So every once in awhile EmmaLou will scarf up a goody or two, but not on a regular basis. She loves the crockpot because there are always yummy smells coming from it. Thankfully she hasn’t figured out how to get the top off yet!

  10. You know what THEY say…..the family that farts together, stays together. Yeah, tweeting and tooting, not much difference.

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