So Many Coupons, So Little Need

This subject has been discussed before here at Chez Crone and Bear It.  Since it has deep psychological implications, it  needs to be revisited.

I have 327,455 coupons for 20% off at Bed, Bath and Beyond.  I have about 32,250 coupons for half off at Omaha Steaks with more appearing on an almost daily basis in my email.   There are at least 8,272 coupons for various types of Progresso Soups, Campbell Soups, Healthy Choice Soups, and boxes of Lipton Soups.  I have clipped millions of Pizza Coupons — Papa Murphy’s, Papa John’s, Papa Ooomowmow, LaRosa’s Pizza, Marion’s Pizza, Pizza Hut, Pizza House, Pizza Hole-in-the-Wall.  You need some discount veggies?  I have cents-off coupons for every type of vegetable known to man;  be they canned, frozen, or wrapped in Saran Wrap in the back of Vinnie’s Vegetable Emporium and Crab Shack.  I hoard flyers from Trader Joe’s and Jungle Jim’s and all my local grocery stores in case there may be an errant coupon lurking in the pages somewhere.

Coupons have become a new craft for me; an artistic endeavor – they are my refrigerator art.  I eagerly await the Sunday paper so I can clip out hundreds of coupons for food I don’t even like and will never buy but I cut them out anyway because there is an expiration date 6 months in the future in case I change my mind (or tastes).    Then I take all these colorful pieces of recyclable paper and hold them together with cutesy plastic clips.

Use them?  No.   Most never leave the house.  Every once in awhile I will re-visit a coupon, find I actually wish to buy the product and happily discover the expiration date is still in the future.  Then the difficult part is to actually place that coupon in my purse or wallet or checkbook and remember to take it out again and present it to the cashier at the store.  It’s exhausting work for 25 cents off a can of something that the store has jacked up 50 cents in anticipation of you using a coupon.  Whew!

What is this compulsion to cut out coupons I rarely use?  I have no clue — it’s obviously some deep-seated need left over from childhood although I don’t recall my stepmother ever using a coupon at a store.  Then again we had a limited diet with few processed foods – the stepmother made most foods from scratch and I mean that literally.  Many was the night I had to gag something down she had made from scratch.  But that’s another story for another day.

I abhor the ladies that show up on the morning talk shows and brag about how they routinely go to the grocery store with their 18 million coupons in their chubby little hands and by the time they get through the check-out the grocery store owes them $172.50 for 3 bags of groceries.  It makes me irrationally upset.  Smug little women – you want to really know why I detest them?  Because they are ALWAYS right ahead of me in line and it takes twenty minutes to go through all those &^#$ coupons!  It’s true.

It seems more logical to me to stop all this coupon nonsense.  The grocery companies and the food companies should simply mark down the prices across the board.  We would all have so much more time to do other things besides buy magazines and newspapers so we can spend hours clipping coupons or printing them online.

As for me, I will continue my clipping compulsion and I will continue to add them to the stacks already stuck to the refrigerator.  Occasionally I may use one, but I’m thinking a very good idea would be to make a large colorful coupon collage.  Bet I could even sell it on Etsy.


8 thoughts on “So Many Coupons, So Little Need

  1. My wife does this too – but she redeems most of them at the supermarket. I suggest you attend the V-clinic. You know, where you stand up and say ‘my name is Linda and I am a voucherholic’
    Ah yes…yet another 12-step program I require…LOL

  2. I have the same obsession, altho I have a very cute coupon holder with sections in it for me to organize them. It is being held together with duct tape, but I recently purchased a new on on ebay for $4. I organize the coupons at red lights. I know, I am very queer.
    Oh no my love, I have heard worse, much much worse, truly.

  3. I try to do that…But, I can’t. It’s not often that I see one I can use so I don’t bother. I worked with a lady, years ago that was so good with coupon’s. I tried to learn but my little brain just would not get it. I might consider working on that in 2010. With the prices of things…..might be a good idea. Thanks Cronie!
    For me it’s easier to simply cut my grocery bills by cutting out the junk food and the extra processed foods we don’t need — buying fresh veggies, more fruit, less meat. I still try to remember the occasional coupon but most remain on the fridge just hanging out with their friends…sigh…

  4. For me, coupons are like leftovers in the fridge. You just keep them until it’s time to throw them out.
    Well said, but it’s still a sickness with me – I can’t throw out the Sunday paper without clipping something…anything…ackkk

  5. We cancelled the Sunday paper and that ended my coupon clipping days. I agree with SMB that they just rot until they expire. I mean my coupons even grow mold on them.

    I like what Costco started doing. They mail you a coupon book and then you bring the book with you. When you are in the checkout line, they scan your coupon book and then it gives you the credit for any of the items you purchased that has a discount coupon. No more clipping. I love it.

    But I am with you, they should just put the item on sale. Think of how many trees would be saved. All the time that people would save. I think that if everyone would make a pact to stop using coupons then maybe companies would stop this practice. Besides if the economy keeps going downhill then we won’t be able to buy processed food anymore and that would end those stupid coupons anyway.

    I like your shopping list. I need to follow that list.

    God bless.
    We only keep the Sunday paper for the tv guide, comics and some of the shopping circulars – that’s alot of money wasted but we can’t seem to get out of the habit of having a paper delivered – not that our paper is any good by newspaper standards – in fact it’s somewhat of a joke as most of the news has already been published online and too often the front page contains something local not national or even headline worthy. I miss my Washington Post. As to shopping list, Devoted Spouse really enjoyed Papa Oooomowmow – of course that was his generation…I need to get writing now. So many words so little time… Hugs!

  6. OMG, we are kindred spirits on this topic here! Please pass along the Pizza Ooomowmow (just cuz I like the name!)
    I think the ‘idea’ of wanting to save $ is why we collect these scraps of paper. I keep mine in a ziplock bag in the car but NEVER can locate it among the mess when I ‘think’ I may need one.

    Yeah…those coupon lovin’ housewifes in the check-out line…don’t get me ranting!
    Apparently I’ve hit a nerve – I love it that I’m not the only one who fools with this stuff and then never uses the coupons! Papa Ooomowmow was added because I knew my husband (who’s a 50’s fan) would get a kick out of it and he laughed outloud at that one. Hugs!

  7. We don’t get a newspaper so my few coupons have to come out of magazines so this, thank goodness, is one of the few compulsions that I don’t have.

    Now ask me about my new obsession with yarn, knitting needles and patterns thanks to someone we both know. :0)
    Do you know that lady who teaches the knitting class STILL hasn’t called me???!!! I will never learn to knit at this rate. In the meantime, I went to the local scrapbook store and put my name on a list and THEY were supposed to call me to notify me of upcoming classes in scrapbooking and I’ve never heard from them either!! I think people must not like my name — I’m giving up on learning any new crafts. I will stick to designing note cards, painting eggs, crosstitch, writing and reading – that’s it! Oh wait – I got a book and a mag on photography the other day — yeah I want to do that too. I need more hours in my days…I know — I’ll give up clipping coupons! Yippee now I have time for photography!

  8. uh huh, I clip ’em and then throw them away after they expire. I’ve never been one of those people who takes coupons to the market, buys $400 worth of groceries and has the market give me $2.45 back at check out.
    Well, dahlink welcome to my world…

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