This Ain’t No Bull

big bull

Devoted Spouse and I have been looking for a quick getaway – just a couple of days of rest, relaxation and maybe looking at some local sights within a few hours of home.  Since my disastrous driving (1,000 road  miles) trip recently, I don’t want to be in a car for more than 3 or 4 hours so that severely limits where we can go.  Plus I’m hampered by a physical therapy schedule and, of course, school starts on the 24th of August.  So if we’re to get out of Dodge for a day or three, we need to find something somewhat local.

On our coffee table in the family room sits a small book entitled, “Ohio Road Trips by Neil Zurcher” and it documents day trips and some a bit longer all over the state of Ohio and tells you the hot spots and fun things to do.  There are parks, museums, animal features, strange and odd things such as haunted places, and, naturally, tons of historical goodies.

I started perusing the book and found quite a few places north of us in Amish country that we could easily travel to and back with no problems, providing we could find a place to stay this last minute – Amish country is so full of tourists at this time of year this may turn into simply a day trip.

What truly caught my eye was the number of Ohio festivals mainly during the spring, summer and fall of the year.  One in particular jumped off the page — it takes place in a town in northwest Ohio called Tiro.  It’s named The Tiro Testicle Festival.  Yes, I said the Tiro Testical Festival.

Apparently this is not a large town – just a wide spot on the road with a few businesses but every April thousands of folks come here to join in this festival celebrating bull’s testicles.  Yes, that part of a bull some may know as “mountain oysters” or “prairie oysters” and are touted as a yummy delicacy.  The book tells the story that the owner of the local tavern was given a “box of the delicacies” back in the 1990s.  He fried them up and served them to his customers (I certainly hope he gave them fair warning of what they were about to consume.)  It seemed to be a rousing success and has now turned into an annual event.  Every April almost a half-ton of bull gonads are now cooked and served to the crowds.  This festival doesn’t have a parade (hell, the poor bulls would just limp anyway), nor do they crown a queen (who wants to put on their resume someday the fact they held the Testicle Queen title in 2005?).  So, there isn’t much to do at this festival.  To quote from the book, “We drink beer and eat testicles.”  That’s it.

I have nothing further to add.  I think the above pretty much speaks for itself.  All I can think is darnitall, it’s not April.

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8 thoughts on “This Ain’t No Bull

  1. Well, there is a fun filled get away if every there was one! Grab your balls, pack the car and come west to the cement pond! LOL
    Yes, I grab balls all the time…EmmaLou’s tennis balls that is….as for comin to the cement pond, don’t tempt me. LOL

  2. Howdy, Cronie! I think I’m out from under the covers. It was hot in there. Hard to push them off, though.

    Day trips that turn into overnights are fun; we all need more spontaneity. L and I took the college tour in Feb, up through Cincinnati, Gambier, Oberlin, Cleveland, Richmond, IN, and back.

    Take plenty of pix of the Testicular Festival, should you decide to go!
    Hello my dahlink – nice to see u – college tour sounded fun – u were in my neck of the woods. So much from which to choose – ack ack. Oh to be young again and faced with those decisions…*sigh* LOL

  3. Oh my! While most anything tastes good fried, I think I’ll pass on this one. *shiver!*
    I would sooner suck a Pepsi up through my nose than taste “mountain oysters” – never gonna happen; I’d starve first I guarantee you.

  4. Now thats a dinner I don’t think I could ever pluck up courage to eat. I feel quite sorry for the bulls. I hope you have a lovely trip though.

    I keep forgetting what a small country England is, you say a four hour drive limits where you can go in America. Here you can get almost anywhere in four hours.

    Thank you for the lovely comment you left on my blog. I was sitting reading it with tears running down my cheeks – but they were very happy tears.

    Thank you for being such a lovely person.

    Take care,
    Sandy.
    Yes, I would imagine the bulls are none too happy about having their “fellas” whacked off. Nasty business that. Happy tears are okay – true, we all adore you you know. Yes, I’m afraid my area of the world is a tad larger than yours, but I so love your area of the world and wish that I could return to England one day. I adored London and when we visited friends in Wales I almost felt like it was home – lovely countryside you have over there. If you’d just learn to drive on the correct side of the street, I might make the move! LOL Hugs!

  5. The have the Rock Creek Testicle Festival in Rock Creek Montana. It is a two day free for all. I’m thinking it’s more about the booze than the balls. 🙂
    To my thinking there is no way the balls could be consumed without prior copious amounts of the booze! LOL

  6. omg, ewwwww. Thank God they provide beer.
    Sorry, there isn’t enough beer in the universe for me to actually place that in my mouth, chew, and swallow. Nope, never gonna happen. I would make a horrid Survivor – I won’t eat bugs, either. For anyone, or anything, or any amount of money. Nope. Some things are better left uneaten. Finito.

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