I Will Learn to Knit if it Kills Me…and it Might…


Is this not a serene picture of a lady just knitting and being so peaceful and calm and happy with her life?  This is what I want — okay, we can skip her outfit, but I want the serenity and satisfaction that knitting brings.  At least that’s what my knitting friends say — knitting helps them collect their thoughts, it calms them down, it makes them happy, it gives them cool sweaters to wear and Christmas gifts to give away plus my doctor thinks it will help strengthen my hand which is still weak from the dislocated shoulder incident way back in January.  Yeah, this is what I want!

Today I made a new friend, Arlene Graham.

what a lovely lady!

what a lovely lady!

Arlene is the owner of the local knitting store here in Beavercreek – a lovely little shop called Fiberworks.


Puhleeze help me learn to knit!!

I have watched this shop from afar for months, always too afraid to go in and admit that I have a terminal case of Knitting Envy and want to learn to knit.  And then one day, I drove by the shop and Horrors!  It was gone!  I was in a hurry and drove by fast and went home to tell Devoted Spouse I had missed my chance.  He drove back and noticed a sign on the door explaining that the shop had moved a few miles away to a better location.  Hallelujah – my knitting fantasy was back on track!

Today on the way to the bank, I took the plunge, stopped in Arlene’s shop, introduced myself and told her my pitiful story of years of trying to learn to knit only to fail miserably.  She gave me hope and I am now on the list for the next beginner’s knitting class.  I’m so happy – but I feel sorry for Arlene.  She’s a very nice lady and she has no clue what she’s in for with me.  If there is such a thing as being a dyslexic knitter – that would be me.  I’m just afraid she’ll throw me out of her shop and never let me return.

Here are some shots of her shop – it’s darling, well-stocked, and even has a little knitting nook where the ladies gather to knit and chat (I’ll probably join but with a paper bag over my head so they can never identify the horrible knitter among them.)  She has a website:  http://www.fiberworksdayton.com but I understand it needs a little updating and she is putting her husband to work making a new and improved website for ya’ll to visit.  But if you ever find yourself in Beavercreek, OH stop in and see her at 1350A N. Fairfield Rd.  Her number is 937-429 YARN.   And tell her Linda sent you (although let’s see how I do with this first – she may get to the point that the thought of my name may drive her over the edge.)

so much beautiful fiber!

so much beautiful fiber!

fabulous colors and textures

fabulous colors and textures

plop down and stitch!

plop down and stitch!

No matter how much I want this I see nothing good coming of it — only disaster.  Knitting disaster follows me like a flea tracking EmmaLou, my Golden Destroyer.  It is inevitable I will stab something or someone with a knitting needle, have a project full of holes that shouldn’t be there, or trip over the yarn and break a leg.  I just know it.  I’m going forward with this project anyway.  Watch out Arlene, here I come!

Go to my other blog to watch me knit – I’m just a flippin’ knittin’ wonder woman that’s for sure!  To give you an example, below is a pic of some practice knitting I did using a book that assured me anyone could learn to knit.


Oh Puhleeze I’m just kidding – that’s not a picture of anything I did – below is  the REAL picture of my knitting:

the most pitiful excuse for knitting there is

the most pitiful excuse for knitting there is

Even EmmaLou wants in on the act as you can see from the below pic — oh this is going to be fun I can see…

this is so trouble

hard to see but it's white yarn on a white rug & it's in her mouth!

I later found her under the table chewing on one of my knitting needles

I later found her under the table chewing on one of my knitting needles

I don’t know when my first class will be – seems as if Arlene’s teacher is also having back surgery (seems to be going around) so it could be awhile, but I’ll keep you updated…or should I say I’ll keep you in stitches…


10 thoughts on “I Will Learn to Knit if it Kills Me…and it Might…

  1. I can crochet which I love to do and gave my daughter the baby blanket I made for her before she was born so she can use it for the upcoming baby. I am working on a baby bunting for my grandbaby which will hopefully be handed down. I tried knitting in HS but failed miserably and I envy those who can knit since they are usually the coolest patterns out there though the Japanese and Russians are taking crocheting to new levels and I found oodles of cool patterns online but knitted items do seem to take the lead.

    I wish you well on this adventure and will be rooting for you and probably laughing at the things that will go wrong and knowing you, they will. :0)

    Hey, if you can do it then maybe there will be hope for me and I can take it up. Just thinking.

    I also want to thank you for your support of my post which I know will get me hate comments/email but I just felt compelled to write given the subject matter. I appreciate it.
    Hi baby – I think I’m nuts to even try this again – I tried to crochet and that was actually easier but I couldn’t get the hang of the different stitches and the one baby blanket I made sort of came apart. LOL. I will always support the right to free speech and we don’t even have to agree all the time! Hugs!

  2. I CAN NOT knit. Seriously! I’m a major spaz. Paint on canvas = check; draw = check; cook=check; knit = fail. Good luck. You started out better then I have ever finished.
    I can’t paint even a decent stick figure on canvas or on the wall, so why knot (sorry) try to knit? Can’t be any worse at this than any other craft I try and i might meet some nice new friends along the way whom I can entertain along the way with my fumbling and knitting disasters.

  3. Oh my goodness woman, have some faith in the lord to show you what to do. Just kidding. I feel the same way about painting. I cannot pain worth a darn. I used to knit when I was in high school and then in my 20’s learned how to crochet. I did not do much because I am not really a crafty person. But then I took up pottery in my late 20’s and did great with that. I had done ceramics when we lived in Panama, but stopped when we came back to the US. I loved pottery, but then stopped after a few years because we moved too far to want to drive to the place anymore and then the girls and working took up too much time.

    Now I specialize in pain, pain here, pain there, frickin pains everywhere.

    But I did a post yesterday about how my tomatoes are growing in my Topsy Turvy thingy. With the four cherry tomato plants growing right now, we have about 50 little cherry tomatoes growing. Wow, I cannot believe I have actually grown any. Last year, I planted one tomato plant with large heritage tomatoes and you know how many tomatoes grew. One, one stinking tomato. How the heck that happen. Just one freaking tomato. Oh okay I did forget to water it and it was in one of those clay pots that suck the soil dry. So even while I was sick I still got out there and watered these tomato plants. And look how I was rewarded.

    So I am saying not to give up on the knitting, try and try again and you will eventually succeed. Ask my little cherry tomatoes if trying again works. I have faith that you will do this knitting thing if you want because I saw those beautiful eggs that you did. And if you can do those you can do anything.

    God bless.
    Thank you for the encouragement – I am going to give it my best try. I figured it would at least make good fodder for blog postings. I am sorry about your pain – I’m going through some difficulty at the moment w/my back and the phys therapy sessions just seem to make it worse. I go to the doctor in the next two weeks and I’m going to try and get him to change my phys therapy to the folks I used to go to, who did so much good work on my shoulder. They worked on my back when no one realized it was broken and it still felt better! I will keep you in my prayers. Congrats on tomatoes – my paltry garden is actually looking good – just a bit empty. Hurts to much to get down to that level to plant and I simply must try your hanging plant idea one of these days. Hugs!

  4. My poor Grandmother tried for years to teach me to knit and crochet but I was dismal at it. I don’t have the patience for it.

    She did teach me to cook and there I excel so she wasn’t a complete failure with me.

    When I want something knitted or crocheted, my best friend is always willing to take on a project all I need do is buy the yarn. Works for me!
    If I had a friend to do this I’d be in heaven! Sadly, I’m not that close to any knitters, just know a few casually. I learned to crochet but I don’t do it well. One more adventure, that’s all this is.

  5. I’ll come bail you out of jail when those knitting needles end up in your teachers eyeballs. 🙂

    HUGS and good luck!!
    You are entirely too good to me; I’ll have my lawyer contact you first. LOL

  6. Years ago I took knitting lessons. I had never knit before. The woman started out by having us make a Fisherman knit sweater. It was extremely complicated. She figured if we could learn to knit that we could knit anything. She was right. In 6 weeks I had knit a gorgeous sweater.

    I also like to crochet. For me crocheting is faster and I get results sooner.

    I think you will enjoy it though. It’s so much fun to see the finished piece at the end.
    I hope you’re right – My main goal here is “do no harm.” LOL

  7. I’m certain that even Emmalou could do a better job at knitting than I could. Good luck! I can’t wait to see your sweaters.
    Sweaters??! Are u nutz? I’ll be lucky to do a potholder…hey remember those weird metal looms we had as kids and we all made potholders? I need one of those…

  8. My aunt loves to knit. She always takes me with her to this little store that is crammed full of people all sitting around and doing their thing. It is a great experience.
    I am in love with the idea of knitting and I can sit here for hours and read blogs of people who knit and I just dream that I could do the same thing. So whenever they manage to get a class going I’ll be the stupid middle-aged broad sitting on the couch with the yarn everywhere and blood running from where I’ve stuck one of the needles in my arm or something. Thanks again for visiting!

  9. The nuns taught me to knit when I was 7 years old. They did so in their usual fashion, of course, at the point of a cane, so I’ve never forgotten how. And I’m actually quite a good knitter. Problem is, I get bored silly halfway through a sweater or cardigan and drop the whole thing. My work basket is full of half-knit stuff, which I hope I will get around to someday. The complicated ones are the most boring, because you can’t watch tv or read, if you’re trying to match a Fairisle pattern, for example.

    I taught myself how to crochet, but it’s equally boring, alas.

    Mind you, if any of the kids presented me with grandkids, then I’d become a lean, mean, knitting machine in two winks of a dog’s eye.
    I just want to have one afghan that I can say I made – I have no aspirations to be a great knitter and I wouldn’t think of trying a Fairisle pattern to save my soul – I just want to learn the basics and have some fun with it. I have a 15-month old step-grandson and I’d love to be able to do something for him, but I think he’ll be 21 and fully grown before I get there!

  10. My mom’s pretty good at crochet and even though she tried to teach me, she gave up since she’s left handed and I am right handed. I don’t know about knitting… I’ll have to ask her!
    I come from a step-family where all the women either crocheted or knitted – my step grandma taught me to crochet – I just sucked at it – my best friend taught me to knit and she was a left-hander (I’m right-handed) – again I just sucked and that project went to meet Jesus with all the others. LOL

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