I Don’t Like Spam! (but I love Monty Python)

Once again my Gmail account is being inundated with spam.  I hate spam.  But this spam is almost funny – and I find myself actually reading some of it before deleting.  I have no clue how they found me and the unfortunate part of this is I will eventually have to change my Gmail account and that just causes all types of inconvenience for me since I can’t remember who I’ve given it to lately.  Grrr.

Here’s some rather odd spam coming in today:  Amanda says my check is still waiting – hmmm, wonder what I have to do to collect?  The Federal Grant Connection tells me there are still federal grants available and I should get cracking in order to collect mine.  If only if was that easy…oh wait a minute…it IS that easy…it’s called WELFARE.  Duh.

There’s a divorce lawyer who wants to give me a private consultation — I don’t think Devoted Spouse would appreciate that.  No thanks.  I know when I have it good – this girl ain’t goin’ nowhere!

Lanty P. tells me I can make money from home for doing entirely “nothing”.  Well, shoot, I do that now.  It’s called retirement.  Double Duh.

Here’s one on Military Benefits Update – hmmm, I was never in the military.  The only benefit I get is the fact Devoted Spouse collects a  military pension and is kind enough to share it with me.  And should he one day go to meet Jesus, I will still be taken care of but I don’t like to think of that as a benefit.  I could never benefit without my Devoted Spouse.

Michael M. is still pestering me for my shipping address because as he puts it:  “An incredible oversight has created a ‘glitch’ in the rapidly growing wireless industry, opening an amazing opportunity for you to make a fortune online working from home.”   Gee let me get that address right to ya Mikey.  Can’t wait for this opportunity.

Alot of spammers are looking for work-at-home-people and are interested in typists…Typists???  – I thought the word “typist” went out with the 20th century.  How bizarre.  Well, then again, I CAN type.  Heaven knows what they want typed – I think I’ll pass on that offer.

Lots of nice folks want to share a picture with me.  Isn’t that just the sweetest thing you ever heard?  Delete, delete, delete.  I’m getting thousands of offers for Match.com even though I’ve never visited their site and have no interest in being matched with anyone other than my own match which was definitely made in heaven.

I guess I shouldn’t complain — today I only have to delete 249 spam messages — the other week I had over 3,000 at one time and I thought the system might blow up.  These people should be taken out behind the shed and beaten severely for causing me this much inconvenience.  Or they should have to live a life of eating Spam at every meal.  That might do it.

I hate Spam!

no spam


7 thoughts on “I Don’t Like Spam! (but I love Monty Python)

  1. I have a gmail account and keep it because I use it for my Blogger log in and a couple of newsletters but I average between 1000 – 2000 spam messages most days. Gmail is good about catching most of it so I just use the “delete all” and don’t mess with it though I will catch the topics on some while waiting for that many emails to delete.

    Haven’t seen you by my place lately – you’re gonna give me a complex :0)
    Stop by and look at the pics from vacation and check out Lucy.
    Shame on me – I didn’t visit coz I thought w/you vacationing you wouldn’t be posting. Bad blogging buddy, bad,bad. I’ll visit Mon promise. BTW I loved your comment on my newspaper letter to the editor – and one of my friends @ church (who also posted and agreed with me) talked about this lady Delaney who really felt strongly about it — I laughed and told him you were one of my best buds from the blogging world and you were supporting me. It was just a cool moment. Did I also tell u that ur comments here on WordPress are suddenly showing up as spam? I’m not sure how to stop that yet so i just check spam daily. Hugs!

  2. Yeah, what’s with gmail? I love not having to refresh to know if anything new has come but suddenly I’m getting lots of spam too and I never sign up for anything using that address. Is gmail selling my information? Wonder who I can write and ask that question?

    P.S. I’ll never get caught up on my reading or posting. We’ve already got overnight company. Ugh.
    Hi sweetie – Are you rested, relaxed and feeling great? You can catch up later. Enjoy your company. As for Gmail – I wouldn’t be surprised if we were all on lists of marketeers everywhere – I’m very upset about it because i have NEVER had an email account anywhere else (like Yahoo) that ended up with this much spam. It wastes my time to go through and delete because every once in awhile there is a legitimate email stuck in there so I have to scan all of them. Grrr. And I like so many of Google’s features.

  3. I love spam. That comes in a can. I sometimes think I’m a poet. Oh Well just a SA . Not having any trouble with Email accts but internet explorer is bulking at opening some blogs. Sometimes takes 2-3 trys then will open. A couple times I had to use Safari. Anyone else having this problem?
    Ewww spam in a can is not my favorite. My prob w/ Internet Explorer is it doesn’t always open pages, to. I downloaded Mozilla Firefox and it Constantly crashes. Of course I have a Dell with Vista and it is always crashing – $2,000 piece of crap. Next time out I’m going for a Mac I think. Or give up computing completely! LOL

  4. It’s the Vista thing. Worst update to Windows ever. I use Firefox on my imac, nary a problem. 🙂

    Re: the spam, I have a yahoo email account, and yahoo seems to do a great job of keeping the spam out and I still get the emails I’m supposed to get.

    Not so with my local internet provider (kanokla). They seem to keep EVERYTHING away from me, even emails from family & friends, so I only use my yahoo email account these days. Thank goodness it works well!
    Technology is becoming a pain in my butt…but…I can’t live without it!

  5. Hi Cronie,
    What? You don’t like Spam?
    I adore Spam, especially Lite Spam (less sodium & less fat). It is yummy when fried and served with eggs and toast.

    Wait a minute….

    You were talking about email spam.
    Don’t like.
    That stuff is evil.
    The only Spam I like is Monty Python’s skits and songs about spam. I hate the stuff in the can – that’s where the strange pieces of animals must go coz it tastes weird to me. LOL

  6. WOW wow wow have you been busy with the blogging!!!!!
    I adore Monty Python, grew up with the show and all I can say is …
    spam spam spam…lol.
    NICE pics of you and Devoted Spouse too!

    I am CONVINCED that gmail sells ones address etc…
    I never use my account and when I rarely visit it is shocking how much spam is there.
    Most of mine comes from asia…..

  7. I love Monty Python- although it has been quite a while since I have seen it.

    I barely use gmail. The problem with gmail is although I didn’t sign up for many newsletters, I still got a lot of porn spam and regular spam. It was ridiculous. Now I use Yahoo and have had no problems- well, except for the occassional “You’ve won 500,000 pounds (which is what in American dollars?)” I’m rich! I’m rich! Yeah, right!
    Monty Python is my absolute favorite. I could watch all the sketches for hours on end and just keep laughing and laughing because they are so stupid they’re hilarious. Brits are much funnier than Americans any day of the week in my book. As for spam I keep getting this letter from a very nice Nigerian man wanting me to wire him money…

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