This is why I brought home EmmaLou, the Golden Destroyer. No, this is not her picture but it is the spitting image of her as a puppy. You can see why she just melted my heart and came home with me.
Life has never been the same and it’s been 5 and 1/2 years now of one good day, one bad day, one day of those gorgeous brown eyes looking at you adoringly, one day of pooping in front of the door, one day of silly doggie smiles, one day of dead baby rabbit hanging out of her mouth. That’s what being the mom of a fur-child is all about. There are ups and downs just like raising a real child.
If EmmaLou were a cat, she would be on about her 1,257th life right now. I have threatened her with the puppy home more times than I can count. She’s so not scared of me.
Yesterday, (probably not the best thing for me to do) I lightly helped Devoted Spouse do some gardening. I had posted pictures on my other blog Crap on a Crutch Monday of what a mess both the regular garden and the herb garden had become over the winter. Then we went to work fixing them up some.
My biggest problem with gardening is this:
Oh, yes,they are just flippin’ adorable aren’t they? They’re fluffy and have cute little noses and white tails and one of our current residents has the most precious little white blaze on the front of his face I could just cuddle the daylights out of him. BUT – they eat everything in the garden regardless of what I plant…they nibble it to the ground. Very expensive and very frustrating.
Last year Devoted Spouse erected the fence from Hades (as you can see by the remnants in the picture over on other blog. While it was effective, it was the ugliest thing you have ever seen — my garden is sort of kidney shaped and outlined in beautful heavy stone and it’s just so pretty to put fencing around that ruined the artistic effect of the garden. But it was the fencing or losing every vegetable we owned. The fencing won.
This year I asked the nice man at the gardening center what to do to keep the rabbits from my beloved vegetables and flowers. He gave me a suggestion for a product which he claims comes very highly recommended so this is what I bought:
It’s supposed to be natural, not harmful to animals, and especially important, not harmful to the plants themselves. So after Devoted Spouse spent all this time cleaning out and re-planting the herb garden, I got out the Liquid Fence and started reading the instructions. BTW, here’s how the herb garden looks this morning — you’ll notice a big difference I think from the other picture on COAC site.
It’s all nice and neat and has several new herbs planted. Now for the Liquid Fence application – and no rabbits will destroy my nice new plants.
While Devoted Spouse was still on the ground, I leaned down and started liberally spraying Liquid Fence. I thought we would both die right there on the spot. I have never smelled anything this noxious in my life. All I can say is now I understand why I did not choose Autopsy Technician as my career field. It smelled like a combination of all the urine in the world mixed with blood and feces of animal species that have yet to be discovered thrown together with a liberal amount of filthy sneaker stink. I’m sorry but that’s about as accurate a description as I can give you – it was that bad! Devoted Spouse just about keeled over. I gagged so much I thought I’d never stop. But I kept spraying. Those rabbits were not going to win this year.
We left the premises to get some fresh air and also to go inside for a drink of water and to cool down.
When we came back outside, EmmaLou came with us. She made a beeline straight for the herb garden, did a Golden Retriever happy dance in the air, then completely covered my new basil plant with her mouth, pulled it straight up out of the ground and ran around the yard with it. Oh yes, completely covered in the odorous Liquid Fence. Dear God in Heaven help me — my dog actually is attracted to the scent of Liquid Fence.
Now I’m not concerned with the rabbits – now I have to figure out how to keep EmmaLou out of the gardens. Some days you’re the windshield, and some days you’re the bug — today I feel my butt going right through my face as it slams through the windshield of gardening life.
Anyone want her? Because I’m this close to turning her into a doorstop. Yes, Devoted Spouse managed to retrieve and replant the basil. Yes, we got EmmaLou away from the garden – but I don’t know for how long — and I am so disgusted with the fact she found this absolutely dead-smelling stuff to be attractive. I give up, I just give up. I don’t think I’m destined to be a gardener as long as there are rabbits and a Golden Retriever from Hades lurking.