You Wanna Drink WHAT With That?

gourmand

An article in a local paper the other day had an interesting take on just what we should all be drinking with certain foods for the very best gastronomic experience.  (Thinking a gastronome might just be one of those flatulent little garden statues, I had to make a quick detour to the dictionary…) Anyway learning that it was, in fact food related, I decided to give the article a quick going over.  I’m glad I did because there were some major problems that I feel compelled to correct.

The items discussed were: burgers, fried chicken, pizza, Mexican food, Pad Thai, Indian food, Sushi, Fried rice, and Beef teriyaki.  As to the beverage pairings here goes.

rolling-rock-beerBurgers (particularly cheesburgers) should be paired with draft root beer or ginger beer.  I haven’t heard the term ginger beer since I was a child and it didn’t sound good then either.  Nope – the correct pairing here would be either Coke (or Diet coke if you prefer) or Rolling Rock beer.  That one was easy.

Fried chicken was paired with the  most unbelievable beverage I’ve ever encountered.  The authors suggest a “refreshing peach and mint shake”.  I’m not kidding.  No, no, a thousand times no.  Fried chicken goes with…hmmm, let’s see…Coke (again Diet if you like), Rolling Rock beer, or even chocolate milk – but absolutely nothing containing peaches and mint.  *shivers uncontrollably at the idea*

coke1What do you drink with Pizza?  This is just too easy.  But – the authors suggest an Italian wine or something called a Spanish garnacha (which may or may not respond to antibiotics).  Are you crazy?  With pizza you drink Coke (or Diet), Rolling Rock beer, or I’m gonna go out on a limb here and suggest any other type of beer you prefer (I’m feeling generous today).  No wine with pizza please.  Unless you’re one of the Housewives of OC.

Next up is Mexican food — guess what?  The writers of this stupid article want you to drink a nonalcoholic soda made with wine grapes, lemon and cane sugar called Sangria Senorial (which can be found at Mexican food markets).  Now Devoted Spouse and I have visited our share of Mexican food establishments and this particular libation is not to be found on any of the menus.  Know what is? Either Corona or Rolling Rock or Coke products.  See how easy this is?  Why do we make these things so difficult?

Next – Pad Thai.  Ready?  A Latin Bellini with mango.  Oh, gag, gag, gag.  Pairing mango with Pad Thai should just be illegal.  Pad Thai should be enjoyed with a nice cup of hot oriental tea.  Not even beer or Coke this time; tea.  Done.

Now for Indian food.  The author suggests a white kiwi sangria or a viognier (what?) wine be consumed with Indian food.  Okay I had to look up viognier  which is just a white wine type of grape (pronounced vee-ohn-ay).  Nah – What  you drink with Indian food is Pepto Bismol.  Even Coke isn’t going to settle your tummy after this stuff.

For Sushi  it is suggested we drink a ginger lime crush because it is perfect with raw fish and also compliments the saltiness of soy sauce.  Nope – with sushi you first drink the most potent alcoholic beverage you can find so you don’t realize you are actually consuming raw fish.  Then later when you purge all this you settle the tummy with Coke (not Diet this time).

Fried rice was paired with a pineapple mojito.  Actually that sounds rather good.  But I’m not so sure that pineapple juice, white rum and club soda will mix well with the fried rice – actually I’d go with the requisite oriental hot tea on this one.

The last category is Beef teriyaki and it is suggested to drink a mandarin orange Champagne cocktail because this will compliment the beef.  What are these people smoking?  Beef teriyaki needs Rolling Rock, a Coke, or this time I’ll even go so far as maybe a nice glass of red wine (my favorite Pinot Noir would be nice).

There you have it.  What the experts think and what a normal gal would do.

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13 thoughts on “You Wanna Drink WHAT With That?

  1. I’ll have to disagree with you on brands…. Michelob Ultra (not that dark stuff… ick) or Pepsi. Other than that, I’d say you got it right. After all, on the burger commercials, don’t you see Pepsi (or Coke) or a beer? Hello? Not sure where those article writers came from, but it sure wasn’t from here… LOL I’m almost willing to bet that their crack habit has severely limited their intake of real food… and drink.
    Okay I’ll give ya the Pepsi (I’m a Southern gal and grew up on Coke, but then again when we say Coke we mean any kinda soda, so go figure.) I tried Michelob Ultra and just don’t like the taste. Different strokes for different folks – I’m completely hung up on Rolling Rock because it doesn’t taste dark either.

  2. I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

    Sarah
    thanks

  3. I have to agree with Davis. Although, I am not sure I would match the same foods/drinks. But I am a bit crazy anyways! 🙂
    me too – but I’m really just a simple gal, not that I wouldn’t drink any of those concoctions – just leave my basic pizza and burger combos alone!

  4. I agree with the Normal Gal. Those idiots must be pulling our leg.
    A cold beer (really cold) compliments anything.
    See you later in Tweetsville.
    roger that

  5. I have to suggest a frozen Margarita when consuming Mexican food. My diet soda of choice is Dr. Pepper (don’t you want to be a Pepper too?) other than that, they can have whatever that crap is they suggested thanks anyway.
    I’ll give you the Margarita – that’s always a good choice w/Mex food – I just left it out because since I’m trying to watch the calories I chose to ignore it. That’s probably my favorite drink and I hate to have to give them up but the calories and sugar in them are astronomical. Sometimes life sucks. I can always find enough spare calories in a day to enjoy a Rolling Rock beer, though, and that will have to do for now. I love Diet Dr. Pepper. Yum. I’ve also become addicted to Diet A&W Root Beer.

  6. I spit on my computer while laughing about the Indian food. I totally agree! I’m a Coors Light girl myself.
    I seem to have that effect on some people…

  7. Hi this blog is great I will be recommending it to friends.
    that would be a good thing I need all the readers I can find…

  8. Ha! I laughed out loud while reading this, which was bad because I was at work (shhh). I totally agree that most of these so-called beverages are completely inane. Not sure I would go with Rolling Rock for every occasion, because I do like lots of different beers, but you are more on the money, that’s for sure!
    thank you baby – the Rolling Rock’s on me! (but just for you)

  9. We don’t get Diet A&W around here, whaaaaw!
    Bummer – I’d start a campaign to have your local grocery store stock it – I can’t live without it!

  10. I generally think all things either go with beer or sweet tea. I need to get out of my box. *sigh*
    No you don’t – I’m sick of people telling me to think outside the box – boxes are for holding stuff, not coming up with bright ideas – if you tell me to think outside my brain I might try it, but leave boxes out of the discussion. Done.

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