It is that wonderful time of year — snow, jingle bells, Christmas cards, egg nog, presents under the tree, dogs wearing reindeer antlers, and people driving on the roads like little bats out of you-know-where.
I was on my way to the hairdresser today and as I was entering the highway a black SUV was also entering, but the difference between the two of us was I had the right of way and she had a yield sign. Do you think that made a difference? Nope. In fact this lady must have a completely different understanding of the word “yield” than I because when she got close to the yield sign, regardless of the fact I was right there, she gunned that baby for all it was worth and demanded I let her in front of me. So what did I do? I let her in. She was obviously in a tremendous hurry and must have been responding to some type of holiday crisis as she had a cell phone pasted to her ear and seemed to be yelling and had a pained expression on her face. Or maybe she dropped a cigarette in her crotch, I don’t know. At any rate, I let her go ahead of me. Why? Because I have Christmas spirit. I wanted to beat the crap out of her with a big tire iron, but because I have that Christmas spirit I simply drove away. Okay, I still hope she gets ashes in her stocking Christmas morning.
On the flip side, this morning as I was driving out of our driveway, the trash man was actually bringing our big green trash can back up the driveway to where Devoted Spouse was standing. He didn’t have to do that; he has lots of other trash cans to empty, but he has the Christmas spirit. As I watched that I wondered if he would have a merry Christmas this year, and as he drove away I followed him, got out of my car and pressed a twenty dollar bill into his hand and wished him a Merry Christmas. His face lit up. Now we both had the Christmas spirit.
I’m on my way out to do some more last minute shopping. You see, Devoted Spouse came in a little while ago and announced the number of presents has increased a little and if you read yesterday’s posting you know I can’t have an unequal amount of gifts under the tree — so I’m off to hit the aisles of Target for a few more little goodies. Along the way I will spread some more Christmas spirit where I can. Maybe I’ll look for a Salvation Army kettle I can drop some change into. A little Christmas spirit here; a little Christmas spirit there; it all adds up and we should all spread it around liberally.
Except for the lady in the black SUV. Just stay out of her way. I bet she doesn’t even have a chimney.