Last night was one of the highlights of my life — I was privileged to attend a live show of Emo Philips. In case you aren’t aware of him, this man is one of the comic geniuses of our time. I’ve followed his career for about the last 20 years or so and always try and catch his appearances on late night tv. He’s done some animated voice-overs, too. And, he has a couple of CD’s out.
Here are some examples of Emo wit:
“I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, “I’m going to mop the floor with your face.” I said, “You’ll be sorry.” He said, “Oh yeah? Why?” I said, “Well, you won’t be able to get into the corners very well.”
“I ran three miles today, finally I said, “Lady take your purse.”
“I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy.”
“I went into Gus’s artificial organ and taco stand. I said, “Give me a bladder por favor.” The guy said, “Is that to go?” I said, “Well, what else would I want it for?”
“I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky—but there wasn’t any gum under any of them.”
“A cop pulled me over in Massachusetts for drunk driving. He asked me if I knew what the punishment was for drunk driving in that state. I said, “I don’t know, re-election to the Senate?”
I laughed so hard last night I thought at one moment I might stroke out. I was in danger of losing bladder control; that’s how hard I laughed. And I wasn’t alone. My friend Terri Ann was in hysterics right along with me. She’s a true fan and has seen his live show probably 6 or 7 times.
Emo is not just a funny guy, he loves his fans. He recognized one fan in the audience and even remembered what this guy did for a living. He came back after his set and tried out some of his new material (I love Amish jokes) so we were treated to 2 shows in one night. Then, after he’s done he hangs around to talk to his fans, or as he calls us… emo-philiacs. Of course, I forgot my camera – so I had to use my cell-phone camera which is pretty crappy – but I have a memento. He signed a CD for me and Terri Ann and I had a nice chat with him. This is one nice guy.
Like all of us over the past 20 years, he’s changed a little — now his trademark long brown bob is grey and he looks a little bit like Arlo Guthrie, but he’s still cute, slightly manic, very goofy, and my favorite comic. If you like to laugh – check out his schedule at your local comedy club – or on his website… you’ll thank me.