Just when I think I’ve seen it all, along comes someone who messes with my particular life paradigm. Yesterday evening my model of friendship was sorely tested and at a bible study, no less.
Let me back up. A few weeks ago a friend from church, a good friend, joined Devoted Spouse, trusty canine companion, and me for a bit of birdwatching and a bite of breakfast on the deck. I had made a delightful albeit fattening breakfast casserole (courtesy of my bff Paula Deen). The recipe made much more than any of us could possibly consume; even EmmaLou the Golden Destroyer had her fill with one tiny doggie serving. I divvied up the remaining casserole into two Tupperware-like containers (okay they’re Rubbermaid); one for my friend and one to remain here.
Last night my friend joined me at the bible class we’ve both been attending for the past 3 weeks. In her hand was my pseudo-Tupperware container. Now, I don’t usually expect folks to return containers to me; that’s why I use el cheapo Rubbermaid. I thought it was a nice gesture of our friendship that she brought this container back. There was only one slight problem.
I looked down at the container she had placed in my hand and while it was indeed my container, there was something horribly wrong. Attached to the side of this container — I’m not making this up — was a previously-chewed piece of gum. In abject horror, I looked up at my friend and said something extremely witty and obviously Bible-driven like “What the hell is this?” I think I punctuated my question with an appropriate sound such as “Ewwww.” My friend replied, “It’s okay, that’s just my gum.” Whereupon I countered with, “Just your gum?? Just your gum??” So I scraped off the gum with my perfectly-manicured and paid-for nail and handed the gum to my friend in case she wished to keep it for future reference.
Now, I love this lady dearly. We’ve been friends for some time and we’ve just recently started doing things together. But, I have questions. And, I’m afraid of the answers. Questions such as: If you store your used gum on Tupperware containers, where do you keep other important items when you finish with them like your dental floss, or perhaps a Q-tip or two? I’m just a tad concerned here.
I can tell you with certainty; I’ll be sending food home with her in aluminum foil from now on.