There’s Something Fishy Going On

One of the pleasures of retirement is being able to stop what you’re doing and go fishing. That’s exactly what Devoted Spouse and I did the other day. We packed up our rods and tackle boxes, put the folding chairs with attached cup holders in the trunk, filled the Ohio State thermal cups with coffee and off we went. After one quick stop at the local drive thru beer, soda, and bait shop to load up on nightcrawlers, it was off to the members-only county fish and game park where you can relax, watch some wildlife, fish, camp out if you like, or use up your spare ammunition at the outdoor range. It doesn’t get any better than that.

Okay it could get better. Actually catching a fish would be nice. In fact, I have been to this lovely sportman’s paradise a number of times since Devoted Spouse joined but I have never caught a fish. Not one. A couple of nibbles, but no fish. I know the fish are there — they mock me by leaping up out of the water and staring at me with their big black fish eyes. Here I am with juicy, yummy, squirmy worm guts on a nice hook and do ya think Nemo is interested in a little snack? Gah…He and all his little scaled buddies are on the bottom of the lake just bustin’ a gill over the sight of me up on land with this stupid fishing rod in my hand and a dumb grin on my face anticipating the big one will bite any moment. I think the fish are getting advanced warning that we are coming. It couldn’t possibly be that I don’t know how to fish — I’ve fished all my life. I grew up around a pond stocked with the biggest bass and bluegill you’ve ever seen and I regularly pulled them in, along with a snapping turtle or two.

I deserve to catch a fish — I bait my own hook even though the dirt and worm intestines ruins my nails. I stand there for hours (okay sometimes I sit) without complaining. I just want to catch a fish. All I’m doing is drowning worms and getting a complex. Sigh…maybe next visit I’ll bring the catch of the day from Kroger and slip it on the hook when Devoted Spouse isn’t looking…

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6 thoughts on “There’s Something Fishy Going On

  1. Linda – I too suffer from the same fish rejection. Doesn’t matter where I go, gulf, ocean, lake, river, creek, pond, mud puddle or even who I go with. They ignore me while impaling themselves on the hooks of everyone around me. Can’t for the life of me figure it out, but the scary part is, I still like to fish. Sheri

  2. Hi Sheri – I’m glad I’m not alone. I won’t give up — I’m thinking of showing up with a spear and a big cat – that might get their attention. *grins* Linda

  3. Fish hate me too – not that I’m saying that fish hate you, of course. I have no patience. I would go fishing with my dad and wait 15 minutes and then decide hiking was better. I never touched any worms either – I just blew them up with one of those syringes that I guess is suppose to fill them with air and make them plumper. Like fish really can tell! Now that I’m all growed up, I don’t waste the money or the time, I just do the hike.

  4. You blew the worms up with syringes? That sounds like a hobby in and of itself worth checking out. *grins* Linda

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