I get bored in waiting rooms and think up unusual mental games to keep me occupied. I love to watch people and make up scenarios and lives for them. This morning was no different. But it was a bit unsettling.
I was sitting in an antiseptic waiting room prior to having one of those mandatory yearly radiological tests where pieces parts of your anatomy are summarily squished between plastic plates. I made a rather uncomfortable discovery. The majority of the people sitting close to me were wearing sandals and had dirty feet and unkempt toenails. In fact, being squeezed amidst the unwashed masses in their Birkenstocks and flip flops made my tummy a bit queasy. Alright, maybe it was the impending mammary-crushing test that upset my tummy; nonetheless, the sight of all those little piggies screaming out for hygiene certainly was discomforting.
Do people forget their feet when they shower? Are feet simply too far away from the rest of their bodies to hit them with the old washcloth? Is there a moratorium on nail clippers these days? I know the price of gas is ridiculous, but can’t most people still afford a bar of soap? Or is it because it is summer and we get a tad bit lazy? Not me. I have perfectly pedicured little piggies and in between pedicures I hide them in Crocs or tennies; I would never show a less-than-perfect toe in sandals. Is it me?
I sat there trying not to stare and wondered to myself…if his toes are that nasty, might he also have lice lurking? Should I surreptitiously move to another chair? One middle-aged lady had very nice sandals on, but chipped nail polish and a couple of bunions from Hades suggested to me she should have picked out a different pair of shoes this morning. At least she was fairly clean that I could tell. A young woman was the exception to the rule — she was dressed to the nines and wore adorable polka dot flip flops with her precious little ocean blue toenails all perfect.
Next week I go to the eye doctor — I wonder what archaeological discoveries his waiting room will hold.