Mom, It’s The Crazy Lady From Church Again

Oh sweet merciful heavens I never thought I’d live to see the day I said these words:  I feel sorry for telemarketers.  Okay I said it and the ceiling didn’t cave in on me yet.  As far as I’m concerned those who call people voluntarily with the purpose of selling something or requesting some type of information have to be either: 1) extremely desperate for a paycheck, 2) accidentally off their meds, or 3) dumber than dirt.  I know because I have temporarily joined the ranks of the telemarketer class.  Temporarily, mind you.  And for a good cause. 

I only had to call about 10 people to see if they were attending a church event on a specific night.  Now that doesn’t seem like a difficult task, does it?  Well let me tell you it turned into a veritable nightmare experience.  Doesn’t anyone in this country answer their phone anymore?  I got the impression everyone was screening their calls.  “George, it’s that crazy lady from church again – don’t answer it.”  After leaving the 5th voicemail I wondered if maybe I should wait for a better time.  I thought calling about 7pm was a good idea but I was wrong.  Obviously I need to attend telemarketing training because the one person I did connect with hedged, hemmed, and hawed, finally said no she couldn’t attend and I didn’t try to change her mind.  I was so uncomfortable trying to talk her into doing something she didn’t want to do that I simply apologized for bothering her and hung up.  What a weenie I am at this phone work. 

What’s even worse about this experience is Devoted Spouse had folks he was responsible for calling, and he delegated that assignment to me since I was doing such a whiz-bang job of leaving voicemails to my own group.  Some of his folks were even worse.  Most didn’t answer.  One answered and fussed at me for interrupting their meal.  Fortunately the last two calls were numbers that were disconnected.  Disconnected was something I could relate to at that point.

I enlisted the aid of a friend at church, Chris, to also call some people.  He was on a business trip and made the calls from his hotel room, God bless his heart.  His emails to me during the week had a Subject line of “Telemarketing NO MORE”, if that gives you an idea what he experienced.  I promised never to ask him to do this again.  I promised Devoted Spouse never to ask him to do this again.  I promised myself NEVER volunteer to do this again. 

I promise never to yell at a telemarketer again or hang up on them without at least saying goodbye and wishing them a pleasant day at the very least.  I would sooner suck a Diet Pepsi through my nose than ever go through this again.


4 thoughts on “Mom, It’s The Crazy Lady From Church Again

  1. You are a brave soul to call people as a reminder or as any other community minded endeavor…I think that telemarketing is right up there with cleaning out septic tanks…you deserve kudos for making such an effort…Hugs to you…

  2. Everyday I manage to find something good about being 88. You’ve just given me another reason. Anytime I am asked to so something “noble”, like canvassing the neighborhood for some charity, I simply tell the caller to find someone younger. I fear, after what I’ve gone through with telemarkters, I might respond with such a request by using words I know but seldom ever use.

  3. Hi Shadowlands – thanks for the kind words – my heart was in the right place, but oh the words that came out of my mouth once I hung up the phone. My, my, I have so much to learn! *smile*

  4. Hi Mary – A long time ago I learned a phrase which has served me well, “I’m sorry but I just can’t.” It usually works like a charm. Except this time – I hesitated and they grabbed me. Oh well I’ll put up with a little griping if it truly helps someone else. Just not too often pleae! *grins* Linda

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