I’m very fond of my friend, Eileen. She makes me laugh and we can always find something to talk about. She’s a diehard conservative like me and we share a mutual dislike of Hillary. Some of the best days I recall when I was working were shared in a cubicle with Eileen. She always had delightful stories of her children and we often commiserated about our work issues or families or whatever was on our minds. I think you see where I’m going here; this gal is just a peach and I love the stuffin’ outta her.
Today Eileen is 40 years old. Happy Birthday, sweetie!
Celebrating 40 years of life is a big deal. The idea of existing for 40 years set me to thinking about how we relate to age in American society. Unfortunately, aging is not something folks generally get excited about. In fact, after a certain age, many of us spend a disproportionate amount of our time left trying in vain to appear less than our actual age. Instead of wearing our age as a badge of honor, we are often ashamed and worried to admit just how old we are and will go to ridiculous lengths to hide that age through surgical or other means. Can you say Spanx? Nevertheless, 40 years is something to crow about in my book. Let’s do some comparisons.
The average lifespan of an American woman is about 79 years. With that in mind, Eileen certainly has alot of living ahead. Not so much, had Eileen been a cow. That average life span is only about 7 years; although according to http://www.didyouknow.cd/cows.htm, a cow named Big Bertha did reach the incredible age of 48 back in 1993. If Eileen had been a ferret, she would have lived about 4 lifetimes by now. Ferrets usually last around 8 to 10 years according to http://www.ferrets.org/Ferrets_As_Pets.htm. If Eileen had been born a snapping turtle, she could expect to live around 30-40 years; her time here would be about over now (http://www.turtlehomes.org/usa/snappingturtles.shtml).
What if we compared Eileen’s life expectance to the average lifespan of a major appliance? A gas stove lasts about 8 years, a refrigerator from 8-12 years (unless it’s made by GE and owned by me). Washers and dryers give out after about 7 to 10 years depending on the size of your family and budget. The average dishwasher can also last about 7 to 12 years (definitely not the norm in my household).
If we take this even further and compare Eileen’s lifespan to the longevity of a car…well, maybe we shouldn’t try this one. Cars are measured not by years so much as by mileage. A truly wonderful car might rack up 200,000 miles in its lifetime. I hate to discuss my buddy Eileen in terms of mileage – nah, let’s skip this one.
Whether you’ve been around for 4 refrigerators or 2 snapping turtles, age is just a number. The number only means something in our silly minds. In my own silly mind, I’d love to be 40 again. And I’m tickled that I can help my friend celebrate her own 40 amazing years.
Happy Birthday, Eileen!