This just in: A driver in Connecticut charged with speeding claimed he lost control of his car when he dropped an Oreo cookie he had just dunked in a cup of milk. I stand with the accused on this one. Losing control of one’s car is nothing compared with losing control of an already-dunked and wonderfully mushy-to-the-point-of-almost-falling-apart Oreo.
Another traffic story out of Iowa tells of a Donut Delite van being pursued by police at speeds of 100 mph. Never, never get between a hungry officer of the law and his morning cruller.
The owners of the Illinois-shaped cornflake finally sold it on eBay for $1,350. Apparently the buyer is going to put it in a traveling museum. I only hope the museum makes a stop close by my town. I once had a Cheeto that resembled David Copperfield but EmmaLou the Golden Destroyer ate it. She can make things disappear, too.
An article on how cars are named got my attention. It states a car company may pay up to $50,000 for a product name. I could use $50,000. How hard can it be to come up with a name? Let’s see…Thunderbird; no that’s taken. Mustang? Nope, done that. Beetle, nah. I know — Lemur. I’d drive a Lemur; wouldn’t you? Lemur is a much cooler name than Yaris or Prius. What the heck is a Prius anyway? Though, you might have to be careful not to drive your Lemur too close to a cliff; no, wait, that’s a Lemming. Nevermind.