Alien Houseplants

While reading a classic sci-fi book, Day of the Triffids, my mind wandered to the subject of plants.  Triffids, you see, are alien plants run amok.

While not technically running amok, my houseplants have been acting suspiciously.  I have four houseplants in a dish garden which was given to me in celebration of some occasion long forgotten.  Two are yellowing (too much water) and two are wilting (not enough water).  Each morning I enter the room and find moss lying on the floor beside the plant stand.  I think the plants are tossing it on the floor after I go to bed as a houseplant practical joke.  These moss fights are getting on my last nerve.  I’m going to install a video camera on top of my recliner and we’ll just see who gets the last laugh as I identify the moss tosser.

Sitting on my kitchen counter is another houseplant; a Wandering Jew.  To be politically correct I should refer to it as the fuzzy green and purple plant and leave its religious preference out of the picture.  My friend told me to add coffee grounds to fuzzy green and purple plant and it would grow well.  My friend was wrong.  Coffee grounds just kept the water from draining and made a terrible mess.  Maybe fuzzy green and purple plant prefers tea.  Fuzzy green and purple plant also gets visibly upset when I use the same dishes for meat and dairy.

One of my dish garden plants is a philodendron.  I’ve heard you can’t kill a philodendron.  I just like to mess with mine a bit.  I gave it coffee grounds and Miracle Grow at the same time.  It was like a double plant espresso. 

Maybe I should back off on the sci-fi-books.


2 thoughts on “Alien Houseplants

  1. I love coming here for my daily * smile*, but this one was a belly laugh, because I too have a difficult time with growing things indoors…My son was the first to make a note of this. On an occasion that I too have forgotten, the florist was at the door when my son answered it.
    After taking the plant from the delivery person, he yelled over his shoulder, “Mom, here is another plant for you to torture.”….
    My son is right. I am afraid that I do cause these poor innocent plants more pain than my pleasure….thank God, Spring is coming and I can get these helpless creatures outside. *smile*

  2. I definitely have a love/hate relationship with these plants and I guess I don’t know when to give up. *grin*

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